"A sin that is not blotted out of repentance is both a sin & a cause of sin." St. Gregory I

i decided to go w/that one and not a friendship quote this time cuz well it reminded me of today. How wonderful that our Lord gave us two d0pe sacarments to learn more bout today. The sacarament of reconciliation and the sacarament of the Eucharist. wow!! thas "coolnesity" haha Lyn lyn did her testimony on the healing power of reconciliation and her talk was great. It was very touching and it juss made you realize how cool that sacrament is. So from there ill start talking bout the growth seminar.

We had our 1st growth seminar today focusing on the innerhealing through the eucharist & reconciliation. It was open juss for our community, give them a chance to learn more bout these great sacaraments. There was a talk apologetics style bout the Eucharist by strider. Though i wasnt there to listen to that one cuz i had get the radio for work for the mediation. oh wait before we had the talk we did praise & worship which is juss excellent. i like the new speakers we have i can see a difference or actually hear a difference now. We played that song, "eternally yours" man i love that song! on the way to church this morning i couldnt stop listening to it. In fact i have that song playing and lead me Lord playing in my head.

So after the talk we had group sharing, between the guys and the girls. It was split up, so each gender can better bond w/some people in the communtiy we may not know. The topic of the discussion was, "what was something you need healing of, whethers is spiritual, emo, physically etc etc." It was a very annointed conversation cuz we were able to discuss our own struggles. The struggles that push back errtime we try to step foward in our walks. Also we helped each other by giving advice on how to solve/overcome that situation. I think the basic theme for the whole conversation/discussion was "trust in God's timing and be a living example unto others." For me probably the biggest struggle i have as of now is my family. It took me a while to be where i am today, yet im not even done in my walk. I havent reached the end of the journey, though i can say that im not lost in the dark anymore. I can say that my community has lit the path for me and i know what path to follow. And if i get sidetracked i know where to go, to help put myself back on track.

A year ago, i wasnt as nearly as what i am today. I was a practicing catholic...though only to a certain extent. Kinda like a practicing cafteria catholic, i picked and choose on my own what i wanted to do. I went to mass errsunday w/my family, though i honestly didnt think much of it. SOmetimes id even fall asleep. I taught SRe yet, i ddint have the knowledge that i do bout who the church is. What it means to be a catholic and what a blessing it is. I had gone to prayer meeting a couple of times, though i was like ehh whatever i was bored. Yeah i prayed, but only when i needed something. Only when it was convient for me i guess you could say. God was in my life, though he wasnt where he shouldve been. I wasnt to the extent where i did drugs, swore, had pre-marital sex etc. etc.

One tuesday, i decided i wanted to take my confirmation kids up to prayer meeting, since ive been there before so i thought id take them. At the same time my cousin was doing youth alpha, so i would go meet him up in the hall after it was over errtues. Well that tues. nite (feb 12 to be exact) i went up to prayer meeting after youth alpha was over and i remember it clearly that tues. Father Grace was talking i dont remember wha but the chairs were all facing the wall where we have the overhead and stuff. I remember i was getting impatient cuz i had to take chris back home still and i still had ot ask i think it was boss lady(obviously i dindt call her boss lady @ the time. haha) if it was okay to bring the kids up there. So at the end of the whole prayer meeting, i got to ask one of the two and i got their okay. I think i was told to email her to remind them so they could set up the chairs.

That next tues.(feb.19) i brought them to prayer meeting i sat in the very back watching them to make sure they were gonna behave. I tried ot get into it but i dont know if was able to. Then i ended up goign back up there after i took my kids down cuz they had to go home. I think errsince that last tues. i would go back up there after SRE was over. My cousin both would, and i remember jaymee & mo rice talking to me after prayer meeting was over, while there was healing prayer going on and music ministry was cleaning up. I guess has time superpassed, i kept going back up each tues.

I remember how my protestant friend had "church friends" and how he would always chill w/them. Anyway, it was funny cuz when i was asked(i forgot by who) anyway to go the FCFC coffee shop i was kinda excited though nervous and insecure too. Well i was insecure/nervous when i would go to prayer meeting after SRE was over. Juss cuz how i use to go then i stopped going then i came back again. I guess i was afraid of being judged. I also kinda remember clearly that nite oF FCFC coffee shop, i met up w/errone @ spv that nite. I was talking to kyle and nicole a little bit cuz thye knew one of my other cousins cuz kyle went to skoool w/him @ the time. Kuya was excited cuz he juss bought a new car that day, the civic he has now. The day was mar. 15 2002. haha i feel like on that MTV show "diary." That nite i got to ride in kuyas car w/boss lady it was us 3. being i didnt really know anyone i was quiet haha. Though i remember in the car they were trying ot make convo w/me it was kinda like 20 ?'s hahaha it was cold that nite too cuz i think it was raining earlier that day. The coffee shop was cool, i saw my friends whom i chilled w/at the time there. After we all ate @ rubios i think @ the cerritos towne center. I think i got something i didnt like, so errsince then i didnt like rubios. Though now i do! haha wow to think im kuya and boss lady's "hijo" now! haha

oh i forgot that one tues. when i was talking ot jaymee and mo rice after prayer meeting, jaymee told me to go to the website and sign the guestbook. I remember then one sun. afternoon after i was chillin in the park juss waiting for the sun to go down. haha jk anyway, though it was one sun. afternoon i was lookin @ the SH website and i ended up signign the guestbook. it took me a while cuz i was tryign to think of wah to put on there to sound cool for some stupid reason. Well on mar. 25 haha mizike imed me sayiing, "hey ja$on this is mike from servants heart, thanks for signing the guest book." you probably think im lame cuz i remember all these days and wha not, the only reason i do is cuz i use to write errthang that happened to me errday in my organizer. i dont remember these days off the top of my head! haha That day he asked me to be part of their skit and stuff. i said yeah sure cuz i thought it was really cool i was asked. Being he didnt even really know me.

Then i guess going to skit practices and stuff i was able to a get a "feel" of errone and more the i gradually chilled w/errone the more i got to know them and they got to know me. I remember the first skit practice @ aelas house. I got there and it was kinda uncomfortable cuz i didnt have anyone to really talk to. The very first face i remember seeing is jennifs. she was on the couch where the tv was w/allegra i think she was crocheting. That was a long practice i think we were waiting for errone for a while before we even begun to practice. I remember jay was trying to dload the "i got a crush on you" instrumental. While talking to mo rice and someone else bout this words he woudl make up. haha I think each time i got to chill w/SH one candle was lit to start the fire. After being w/them for a year now, ive grown to where i understand how wonderful our God is and how d0pe it is to be a catholic.

wow that whole flashback took pretty much all of my blog. i still didnt even touch on the grwoth seminar yet! So back to the whole point of the flashback, my struggle is my family cuz i only want them to be where i am now. To be able talk bout the church and great stuff like that. Though its all in God's time and sometimes it takes a tragic accident for them to realize how important God has to be in their life. So i only continue to be a living example and pray for them. Pray the Jesus; light will be able to shine through me unto them.

Tita beyonce gave this great teaching bout how to give a great confession. She used great analogies also in her teaching. It reminded me of that one bibe talk i sent before xmas. how it talked bout being a "pack rat" and how we need to clean out our spiritual closets often and not juss pack errthang in there. The whole seminar was great. Went to reconcliation again cuz i needed to talk to a priest bout something. Then went to mass, father brennan;s homily was good. Talked bout doing acts of kindess while reaching out and touching those who we would cast away.

After mass, we went to eat @ the china star in la mirada. i got full easy and only ended up eating one plate. THen after dinner well most of us went to watch daredevil @ fullerton amc. Honestly, i liked spiderman better for some reason. I thought this daredevil couldve been made better. There was a lot of corny parts like for example, "where i can find you" "dont worry ill find you!" oh goodness! haha the action scenes were tight, action packed and what not. There was a few suprising scenes in the movie. The catholic church stuff tid bits they had were nice. THe stainglass of Mama Mary and the statue of her inside the church.

Wow this is probably one of the longest blogs ive ever typed! I juss realized if i wasnt for sh, wow a lot blessings wouldnt of came about in my life. Goes to show how there really isnt no coincidences in life. Errthang happens for a reason, God puts certain people in our lives for a reason. Through Sh God has helped me learn to make new friends and meet other people from all over. He has blessed me w/not only one great community but two! He has blessed me w/not juss one group of good friends, but two! they all have made a powerful impact in my life. I wouldnt be who i am today w/o them.

"There can be miracles when you believe. Though hope is frail, it’s hard to kill. Who knows what miracles you can achieve. When you believe, somehow you will, You will when you believe..." im done...im out GOd bless!