"If youre looking for comfort, consolation, if youre asking to Him to take away pain, sorrow, and frustration, then youre on the wrong road w/God..."

I never realized until today, that in todays world that for bout almost err kind of suffering, thurr is some kind of remedy to it. You got a headache? Oh hurr take a couple of advils, you have a cough? take some medicine. Meaning, we live in world full of luxury that no one understands the meaning of suffering anymore. Errone seeks comfort and consolation through errtrial and tribulation they go through. THas wha pretty much fr. paul told me today, we talked bout suffering. He opened my eyes to see a whole new gist of things, praise God.

I love that guy cuz i can talk to him not as a 'priest,' but as a friend so to say. He told me when Jesus walked up w/that cross on calvary, He didnt seek comfort or sorrow. He didnt say kawawa me cuz im suffering, he bore the pain. I learned today that trials, tribulations, tests are all sent out way to show our total dependce on God. It's like a test to see whether we'll overcome them or run away from them. In the old testament Abraham was tested, he was told to sacrafice his only son. And that he did, he was obdient to what God wanted. God tested him and Abraham passed it. Abraham was able to prove his love for God. The same way i learned today, that God does with us.

Fr. Paul told me that St. John of the cross once said something like, 'when you enter a religous community, picture yourself as a large piece of stone or clay. Along that stone you have people thurr rubbing up against you. With that you have people also breaking off pieces of you. Though through all that mess its the Potter, God in it all.' It went something to that extent, i dont know if that analogy made sense. God is in everything Fr. Paul told me. God is in that bab who maybe crying during mass, cuz thas their way of praising God. God is in that man who is snapping his gum in the church yet doesnt know what he's doing is wrong. So through our own messes we have in our lives, God is present in them.

You know im the type of person who loves to have things in order. I want comfort when im upset, i want consolation in my sorrow. When im angry i want things to be coo. When im hurting i want God to take it away. Yet thas not what its all bout, its not bout seeking comfort in difficult times. Its bout putting your trust in God, handing it over to Him and say, "okay God youre in charge, work through me." I mean it all goes back once again to 2 cor 12:8-9, bout His grace being sufficient for us. St. Paul had that thorn on his side, he asked God to take it away. God told him, no i have given you my grace instead which is sufficient for you. Its about surrendering our sufferings for the conversion of sinners, for attoment to those who have sin agaisnt us.

The more we give ourselves to the Lord, the more we wil be tempted. Temptation comes so we can fully rely on the Lord. So that He, HImself can be victorious in our lives. Fr. Paul told me the temptations will come twice as strong during lent. The devil is prowling around like a hungry lion cuz he knows. He knows that were our spiritually right now w/JEsus in the dessert fasting & praying for these next 40 days of lent. Hes looking for us waiting for us to fall down and rejoicing when he fall and sin.

Something that my boss told me today that i was like wow Praise God. In order to get to the Easter Sunday, we must go through the Good Friday. Meaning, were gonna go through the difficult times in order to see the good fruits. Fr. Paul told me the same thing i had tagged on fred's tag board a littlw while ago. "He never said it was going ot be easy, He juss said we'd never walk alone." OH! speaking of walking alone, i gotten into my car this afternoon. I wanted to put on 'Eternally Yours.' So im flipping through the CD case and the first CD i come across, is one that i borrowed from banne. It said 'You will never walk alone.' I was like oh i want to listen to that song. Praise God, its such a powerful song, it really is. I guess its not a coincidence i ran into that song. Him telling me look, im right thurr w/you, walking this journey with you.

I learned a prayer that Fr. Paul told me he was taught when he was little. "Oh Jesus, through the most pure heart of Mary, I offer thee all my thoughts, works, and suffering of this day. For the intention of thy Sacred Heart and particularly for the intentions of the Holy Father, the Pope." Im going to type up the prayer, print it out, and put in my room. This way when i wake up i can automatically pray that prayer. Today was a time for a lot of reflection and growth for me. Praise God, that fr. paul always is thurr for me to talk to. He's gonna let me borrow a book he's reading on St. Catherine of Siena. Okay im tired, must sleep now!

HA can you believe my sister brought home from work a bootleg version of 'THe Passion of Christ.' ?! Thas crazy huh, the quality is the type whurr someone mustve brought a tripoid and videotaped the whole movie. Wow, i dont know if i could watch it for a 3rd time. Maybe ill juss watch certain parts as a reminder of the sacrafice he made for me. How the only thing He said was, 'Father forgive them for they know of wha they do.' Talk bout unconditional love huh.


PRaise God for such an elightening day!

"YOu will never walk alone..."im done, im out God bless!