"At times I feel this void within me...wondering and hoping I would find that ONE thats meant for me...I get tempted at times to just go for whatever is there...but then I think for a moment and I know that ALL THIS WAITING WILL BE WORTH IT...when SHE FINALLY ARRIVES..."

I sit hur watching that movie a walk to remember, while talking to tita beyonce bout relationships. It was weird, i came home and took a shower. Then i felt the need to watch that movie a walk to remember. Maybe God wanted me to see this movie again for some kind specific reason. Hopefully ill be able to get the message he wants me to get. So banne and i had this long conversation bout relationships. It was really good and this is how it all started...

I had read bannes blog about what may have seemed like her never ending car shopping search. Then she asked errone to relate the car shopping to finding a mate. Then i responded by saying you cant on impulse when searching. Take time and think things throughly and completly. THough sometimes you wanna juss get the first thing you see, like at a store. You find something you see that looks d0pe, you juss wanna buy it. Not thinking bout how it might affect your finances or anything, in the future. Anyway, in the end dont give up, tell yourself in the end errthang will be worth the wait. Which is gotta be the most head spinning, difficult, hardest, task to do. ::sigh::

I have this wha is called the beauty and the beast theory. Well i pretty much talked bout in my previous entry a couple days ago. Let me reexplain my theory, i guess its not really mine but disneys. haha so it goes like this, how sometimes you may not see something in someone rgith away. Then something happens, something different sets a different tone in your mind. Next thing you know, you realized something in that person which you werent able to notice before. Whas probably the greatest feeling is when it happens to bof people. I think a perfect example is that movie a walk to remember. Goes to show how there was something there, that wasnt there before.

Today was coo, something d0pe happened tonite @ church. It like pretty much made my day for me. Ill get into that later though, let me recap the rest of my day. Another hot day, full of hot wind and hot heat. It was like blazin hot outside again, im gettting anxious for summer to come. On the reals yo! man i hope summer will be juss as fun as it was last year. I found out that my cousin has planned his wedding on my birfday, which sucks. If it does land on my birfday, i aint going. Imma go out to a club and drink till i get drunk or something like that. hahaha jk no forreal though, imma go out and do something. No way i wanna be a wedding on my birfday, i wanna be out celebrating it some place else. And if errone i know is busy that day, then well ha i guess ill be going by myself out somewhere. Cuz im lonely, im mr. lonely i have nobody to call my own...haha jk

Went to mass this morning, then ate @ hometown buffet for brunch after. I didnt see anyone i knew this time like i did last time i went. THough i ate more this time then last time. Went w/my sister and mom to anchor ble inside the bp mall. Didnt get anything though cuz there was nothing that caught my attention. Took my AOl best friend to western for this asian bball game she wanted to watch. That was fun, i havent seen the heif forever long! We caught up and were reminiscing all the great memories. Like when we went to the spv carnival last year, and she won we three 2 liter pepsi bottle. Or how she wanted to go on the rides and i didnt want to. Or when she saw her friends and they asked if i was her bf and she had to tell them im her cousin. Cuz its too hard to explain errthang to people. ahh the memories, where does the time i go?

Picked up Jl and then rolled over to mizikes for music ministry practice. That went pretty fast, we got errthang down and packed. Being it was so hot we went to get dessert @ goldilocks. It was refreshing and warm! mmm ube ice cream was great! i wanna get ube ice cream w/pandesal thas so good! zena told me that idea a while back ago. Warm up your pandesal in the oven for a little bit. After baked a little bit, add ube ice cream in the middle! ahh thas the best kind of stuff.

After we juss chilled for a while and did nothing. Took JL back home and i went stand in line for confession. The line was jam packed forreal! like waiting in line for viper @ magic mtn. or something like that. They had all the 2nd graders who go to pius, doing their last min. reconciliation so they can turn in their card tomorrow. I saw tito jess and jesty, geez my eyes are really bad cuz when i saw jesty walking i thought it was kuya @ first. PLus he was wearing that billabong shirt that kuya wears too sometimes. Well because fr. kevin was celebrating mass he told us to come back after mass.

Came home and did some stuff, ti was still hot inside the house! eww yuck, thas the worst feeling like feeling all sticky when its hot. Then i talked to heif for a while online, caught up a little bit w/her. She gave me a little advice and said, "good things come to those who wait." ahhh like i said earlier, waiting the hardest thing to do at time. Especially in certain kinds of situations! Waiting can take forever and who knows may not even happen.

I come back to church after mass is over and im back in the same line again. Though this time its not as long as before. It was funny as the mass was ending, they choir had played amazing grace. Jesty and i bof were saying how we felt like we were at a baptist church or something cuz the way the choir was playing. Wow this movie is liek almost over pretty much...aww its so sad. i saw in the theatres when it came out, i wish the ending was better though. ha we were talking bout this movie in SRE on thurs. i forgot why this came up though.

Well fr. kevin tells us he isnt going to do confessions inside the box but in the church rather. He threw the guilt card cuz he told us he;s been doing confessions for a long time. Majority of the people left and there was only like 3 people left. HUrr is where how my day was made came in. So i see this little filipino boy sitting in front of me. He turns around and says to "youre cha cha;s friend from the party." i was laughing so we were talking and stuff then i said hurr ill sit next to you. He wanted to play games but i took his focus off of that and on to praying. We prayed the Our father and hail mary together. He remembered my name!!! it was d0pe he knew my first and last name too! the kid is only 8 years old too! what a memory, the boy has. Then he asked like what skool i go too, how old i am, if i iive bymyself. Then he asked something bout kuya. The kid was so cute that i wanted to take him home and have him for my younger brother! awww

After confession i spent like an hour cleaning the church. I was mad cuz i was only able to do like a half of the church and one section. I had like 2 more sections left, but the custodians wanted me to go. I picked up all the trash from inside the book holders. I rearranged the books and fixed them nicely, setting them up the way they should be set up. it was fun, juss singing and working by myself. It sucks that people dont care how their churhc looks and juss throws errthang around like its their home. Man it takes forevet to get the churhc back into order, though the feeling i got after i was done was great!

"I'll always remember... It was late afternoon... In places no one would find..."im done, im out God bless!

"The flower that blooms in adversity, is the most rare and beautifulist of all."

I got this quote from that movie mulan, mmm mulan. Ya know if mulan was ever a real person...haha anyway, i dont think kids would understand what this meant. This was the part after mulan had saved the country and saved the emperor's palace. So she runs off going back to her village, then oh man i forgot that captin of the army looked at the emperor. The emperor turns and tells him that quote. Its cool the meaning behind this quote. The flower that blooms out of unexpectedness, or cuz of misfortune is the most rare type of flower yet, its still beautiful. I guess this is like people, the most ugliest person you may have seen in the hs or something, the next time you see them at your reunion or something they end up being the one you dont recgonize.

I like that movie mulan i watched it so many times. We were showing it at work on tues., but i didnt get to see it cuz i had to pack the commodities. Anyway, the day was pretty cool. I fell asleep watching a skurry movie, and i forgot to set my alarm for today to do meet up. Good thing i was able to wake up on time though. So we went to the MIssionaries of charity this morning. Man thas hard to stay there and live in poverty, oh man oh man! Ths so hard to be around the real world and not know whas going on. Though its d0pe that the sisters chose that way of living.

We started the morning with mass w/the sisters. It was kinda differetn cuz we didnt even do the prayers of the faithful. After mass we had morning prayer also in the room, we had to take off our slippers. YOu know lately, ive been hurring that prayer "make me an instrument of your peace." I wonder if its a sign fo me or something like that. The sisters split up reirich and corn to the backyard to do some planting. Jeanne, el huego, stider and i stayed in the front. We had a big hard job cuz on the long front gate, theres these vines. So we had to cut them off so you can see through the gate. Jeanne and i worked on that, it was fun cutting them. It was like cutting hair or something. Then the other two guys, el huego and strider worked on weed picking and planting of small fruit trees.

Probably the hardest part of errthang was the cleaning up. It was such a huge mess to pick up and put errthang into the trash bags. We took many different breaks in between cuz it was so hot! Thas another thing why it was harder for us cuz we were in the blazing hot sun. Geez, id hate to be a gardner for my career, i dont even like doing yard work @ home. Today was different though, the sisters were really glad to see us. THey were happy that we were able to help them out. The main sister who was our boss, kept saying Jesus is simling at us right now and we'll be rewarded. Though, to me Jesus already rewarded us, by working for him w/good company! Ü
Next time we go it'll be even more exciting cuz errone will be there together, the guys and the girls! woooO

We also came up w/patron saint names while over there. For example, i am the patron saint of gardening, strider is the patron saint of landscaping, el huego is the patron saint of weed picking and bag holding, reirich is the patron saint of the blang blang and corn is the patron saint of neopolitan ice cream. haha it was funny cuz they had these tree stumps there in the garden. During my break, i got up and took my patron saint picture holding the vine cutters in my hands. Afetr a long morning of hard work, we went to go eat @ some thai food place in lakewood. It was called thai resturant something like that. It was pretty good food, strider knows a place to eat for err city we go to.

Then because it was so hot, we went to get ice cream @ rite aid. mmm ice cream sounds good right now, halo halo sounded good also! mmmmm ube halo halo w/juss the ice cream, the crushed ice and the carnation milk! oOoOh that sounds good right now! While over there, el huego and strider came up w/a few more renditions of my "grace before meals prayer." Instead of using the regular name theyve been using for the past week, they changed it to someone else;s name. They stuck in someone else whom i know, its kinda funny. El huego, kuya and strider work so hard to come up w/new ways to change my grace before meals prayer.

Came home for a little bit, worked on the blog from yesterday. Sent out devotions for today then my dad took out the bedroom door in my parents room and he's putting in there a sliding door. It'll be interesting to see wha it looks like when its done. Finished watching the skurry movie w/strider cuz he came over.

Went to go watch head of state w/strider @ cerritos towne center. Man it was so jam packed that we parked all the way over by old navy. Thas how packed the place was tonite. The movie was funny, its about a political partys pres. canidate got died, so they asked chris rock to be theirs, knowing hes not going to win. Though of course he prooves them wrong and wins the election.HE made up a good point @ the end of the movie while they were showing clips of him campainging. He said, you can go to war when youre 18 and get your leg shot off, yet you cant drink till youre 21. Thas gay, you risk your life when once you turn 18, yet you cant even have alcohol till you turn 21. IF i become president imma change that law, to 18 you can gamble and drink! woooO! haha

Went to get some food @ burger king for the people @ the velacasos. I was craving buffalo wings for the past week now, so i had to go get some. I was getting mad and was pretty close to talking to the manager. I go and order my buffalo wings to go. It took like 20 min to get my order done and it was to go too. I saw people who were sitting down who got their order before mine. I asked the waitress too wha the status was like 15 min after waiting. She told me it shoudl be coming out. Finally one of the waiters who was free was told by the bar tender i was waiting for my food. HE goes and checks on it and then brings it out. I asked the waiter to charge me the happy hour price cuz it took so long to get the food. It was tight cuz he did give me the happy hour price, since i was waiting so long.

Went to the velascos and had a magic mic contest. Aela and archie bought one @ the filipino store today, i want to get one! So we split up into teams, the guys and the girls. SO it was arch, strider and i and jem, aela and babyvee. We played random too, so the comp. randomly picked songs and we had to sing it no matter if we knew it or not. The first round us guys won! Second round i ended up forfitting accidently by pushing the play button. Then the third around we ended up tieing w/them cuz i ended up getting an 88 on "new york, new york." the song by frank sinatra. booo i didnt know that song very well, only the "start spreading the news" part.

So theres been talks in the process of two different vegas trips coming up for the summer. One in may, after errone;s finals are over and skool is over. A great way to kick off the end of the semester, a way to celebrate jems and jeanne;s birfdays too. Then in July probably like that second week, were going back for viii! oOOh yeah! its gonna be my birfday so were gonna go all out like no other!! We aint gonna sleep! i wanna stay in the bleagio or paris, those hotes look so nice! Vi was pretty exciting, a lot of fun memories there. This weather is really making me anxious for summer to come! I cant wait till next month is over!

"Sing to me the song of the stars. Of your galaxy dancing and laughing, and laughing again..." im done, im out God bless!

"There are two kinds of sparks, the one that goes off with a hitch like a match, but it burns quickly. The other is the kind that needs time, but when the flame strikes...it's eternal, don't forget that."

Man i was gonig to blog last nite, but i was watching this movie and i ended up falling asleep watching it. Ha i didnt even get to finish it. Before i knew it, it was time to get ready and go to the missionaries of charity. Ahh this quote is quite interesting. When you meet someone or meet people, usually there comes some kind of spark. The person is saying, the spark is either yeah you and the peron you meet hit it off right quick. I guess its kinda like theres something there. There becomes an instant click between you and the person. THough wha ends happening though, you rush into it and then end up loosing the relationship. Thas what happened to a friend of mine, him and this girl rushed into it too quickly then they end up breaking up quickly.

The othr kind of flame is the one that doesnt seem to burn out. It stays steady and burns slowly, like when you first get to know someone. This is the exact opposite of the other kind of flame. IT doesnt extingusih itself right away, juss like a relationship. You may not hit off right away, though after time of getting to know someone, you may see something in them you may have not noticed before. Kinda like the movie beauty and the beast, belle was of course quick to judge the guy. She thought he was oogly, selfish, uncaring, dirty and rude. Though as time surpasses, the more she got to spend time w/the guy, the more see she saw something in him. Its kinda like that song, "Something there..."

Belle:
There's something sweet
And almost kind
But he was mean and he was coarse and unrefined
But now he's dear, and so unsure
I wonder why I didn't see it there before
Beast:
She glanced this way
I thought I saw
And when we touched she didn't shudder at my paw
No it can't be, I'll just ignore
But then she's never looked at me that way before
Beast:
Lumiere:
Well, who'd have thought?
Mrs Potts:
Well, bless my soul
Cogsworth:
Well, who'd have known?
Mrs Potts:
Well, who indeed?
Lumiere:
And who'd have guessed they'd come together on their own?
Mrs Potts:
It's so peculiar. Wait and see
Lumiere and Cogsworth:
We'll wait and see
All three:
A few days more
There may be something there that wasn't there before
Cogsworth:
Perhaps there's something there
That wasn't there before
Chip:
What?
Mrs Potts:
There may be something there that wasn't there before
Chip: What's there, Mama?
Mrs Potts: Ssh. I'll tell you when you're older.

So if you take a look at the first verse belle is saying, when she first met him, he was mean. NOw she sees something totally different in him, she wonders why she didn't see it before. Then the beast goes on and says he thought he saw her look at her in a different glance. When she touched him she wasnt rough to him, there was something soft. But he says, no it cannot be, i'll just ignore, kinda like he;s in disbelief cuz why would she do those things to him. Hmm it reminds me of that quote i had used in a previous entry that stider always reminds me about. The one bout how you may be w/someone youd least expect. "Sometimes it hurts looking back and moving foward but as long as youre happy now, insecurities are bound to fade."

Belles shows him a suprise a library in his castle full of books he never imagined. She begins to check herself, and says of course he's not the best looking person in village. Though i feel like there's somethign there that i didnt notice before. THen the three characters, like mrs. pots, lumiere and cogsworth all notice that the two of them both noticed that there was something there, that wasnt there before. Bottom line, dont be a fool and rush into things, haha as kuya likes to say dont act impulsively, think bout your actions. So there you go, i leave you w/my thoughts for today.

Yesterday was pretty fun day, i slept in till 0930am and then printed out some hw for phil. Started to do my theatre online hw, the stupid thing closed the hw early so i couldnt get it all done. I had to email the instructor to repost them on there. Which threw off my whole schedule cuz now i had to do the hw i didnt finish today. Anyway, then i was searching endlessly to find someone to ahve lunch wif. I called like 1000 people and they all turned me down. haha jk naw i only asked like 2 or 3 people i think. Finally, jeanne agreed to have lunch wif me. We ended up going to rubios and man it was like jam packed!! It was coo, we talked and ate decided that it was such a beautiful day we should go to the beach.

I went to staples to get some more photo paper to print out pics for the scrapbook. I also got this other kind of photo paper for like frames. Its a 4x6 size, i tested one out, it printed alrghit, thought it came out kinda of crooked. So Jeanne and i went to the beach @ like 530pm. It was d0pe cuz it was the perfect weather to go and walk around @ the beach. We walked around the stores and shops, tempted of course to buy stuff. haha it was funny we saw this store that said, "what lola wants." hahahah Then we went to his vintage thrift store, there were a lot of d0pe things in there. I dont know if id buy or wear it personally. IT was skurry, when we came out, there was this car parked in the street. ON the cars moon roof was these two manican heads sitting on the top. So it looked real!

After we got cold stones, which was also perfect to get too! Then wha happened, oh we walked around the pier and juss really admired all of God;s creation. ITs so perfect and wonderful, the sky was beautiful and so was the sun. The color of it was like oohh wow! Then on the other side of the pier it was all dark and the water was so still. Like there was the ugly side and the nice side. The nite was really cool, juss to embrace and acknowledge all of the beauty God has created. Although it was windy, it was too windy where ti was agh its too cold. So it was fun, jeanne and i did etrrthang we wanted to do. We didnt spend too mcuh time there, we didnt buy anything inside the shops. Enjoyed and admired GOd;s creation and lastly, enjoyed each other;s company!

Went to stations of the cross after i came home. Saw the velascos and aela there. Then jeanne and i went to go to my work. My old hs was having their sadies dance inside the hall. So her and i went to go check it out. man it was crowded! Not only crowded but hot too! we saw all the kids getting their grooves on. Sin errwhere! hahah crazy, juss watching them grinding and stuff, brought back memories of hs dances, oh man i remember my sadies my senior year, wooo i went all out then. hahaha

Then i was watching a skurry movie for a while. Kuya came over for a little bit, but then he left hijo stranded once again! haha agh!!! From there i fell asleep to the land of dreams and what not. Tita beyonce started a blog the other day, hurr link is now on hurr. Along w/a couple of other changes made on the links. Some people made a different blog site, so the new links are added to their names. Well thas it for now, until next time! tooda loo! awww JL said she missed me look!
Thats Me Jen7317: hi
JPFish187: hello
JPFish187: wha are you doing
Thats Me Jen7317: eating....
Thats Me Jen7317: you?
Thats Me Jen7317: hey i kinda miss you
JPFish187: awww
JPFish187: i miss seeing you too

"I've been doing this for nineteen years Wanna fight me? Fight these tears..."im done, im out God bless!

"When youre laying in your deathbed, its not going to matter how much money you made or how popular you were or how much people thought you were great. The only thing thats really going to matter to you, when youre laying in your deathbed is your relationships, how you loved others and how they loved you..."

I finally got the chance to listen to that Cd called, "the truth." The one jeanne gave out on tues. it is basically the truth. The father gives a great talk bout errthang, how to give back to God, how to love others and more good stuff. He's really blunt and throws out the god card a lot. El huego said tonite, his god card is a lot more powerful or effective then ours. I said uh yeah, maybe cuz hes a priest and well yeah. hahaha i was listening to this on my way to work and i as heard the priest say this, it stuck out. So i had to hurry and write it down right quick. He makes a good point saying the only thing that matters before you die, is how you loved others. Did i treat people w/kindess and respect, did i give my whole heart to them. HOw did my brothers and sisters love me?

Then he went on to say, if what that quote meant was true then we gotta look at our priorities. Number one, our first and main priority is, God. Talking to Him errday, spending time w/Him, loving him. Then number two, second priority is your family. Loving others, starts with your family. The priest gave this example of this little girl, who was praying w/her mom along side the little girls bed. She said you know, God bless mommy, daddy, snoopy errone else etc. Then she added, "God and let mommy be as nice at home as she is at church." He pointed out how sometimes that;s the way we are, we put up fronts for people. Like errone else at church or work or skool could think were the greatest people, yet we treat our families like garbage. Then hurr comes on sun. i take the eucharist and its like here i am "look how holy i am." YEt i still treat my family like garbage.

Do i affirm my family? Do i build them up? If not You cant say, "Jesus is Lord of my life," and treat your family like that. Cuz thas wrong, that garbage, keep it real. If Jesus is in charge of your life, you can tell cuz youre more loving and that begins at home. YOu should never go a day w/o telling them how much you love them. If youer loving at home, then you tell the people at home that you love them. You gotta learn to change cuz its time, especially now a days. Why did God make me? God made me to know him and to love him. If im going to love him, that means im going to love others also. Because Jesus said, "if you love me, keep my commandments." Then he said, "This is my commandment, love one another as I have loved you." Jesus gave up his life for others and he told the people around him he loved him, so that must be the same for us. Kuya tells me he loves me, in fact he juss told me last nite. It made my puso hurt and made me cry...awww haha jk check it...
blue83212: kuya's going now
blue83212: bye hijo!!!!!
blue83212: i love you!!
blue83212: hahahaha

agh so i finally made a declaration that no longer will kuyas named be spelled the double o y a. I dont know hwy he doesnt like it, he makes a big deal out of it! agh so i changed it back to kuya. The things i have to go through to take care of this guy. HIm and his songs that he sings all the time. When does it end? oh the agony of the stupid song he makes up and then it ends up getting stuck in my head forever.
blue83212: r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fl
JPFish187: hhaha
blue83212: r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!
blue83212: r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!
blue83212: r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!
blue83212: r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!
blue83212: r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y r-o-b-b-y u so fly! u so fly!

I started to type this last nite, when i got home i got too tired and i had to stop. I dont knwo if you noticed but i added and edited it a few things on hurr. First off, i change some of the blogs, i took off the ones who dont blog anymore and replaced them w/new blog links. Erica's link has been changed cuz she has different site. Gail's as well cuz she has a 'blurty." THen i juss added this morning, tita beyonce's link to the rest of the bloggers. Woo another person who has hopped on the blogtrain.

Lets recap my day from yesterday, shall we. I went to mass @ 8am, its always a nice thing to start your day off w/mass. After i got ready and ran over to work cuz i had to talk to an elementary skool bout camp stanton. In a way i wish we didnt have the spring break camp cuz then it kinda ruins my own spring break. Oh well i guess it'll me more $$ for me in the long run. Lyn²'s pre skool program i heard was a hit once again! woo im really proud of her cuz of all the progress she has made within a month. How d0pe is that, her pre skool program is off the hook and so will her polynesian dancing program. She's got a grip of kids who signed up for it, so that'll be interesting to see. I can be a guest speaker and show them the "figure 8." haha sike!

Went to the bank, to cash my check. Did all that finance maintence and what not. Talked to kuya online bout the whole name change. Agh he wasnt going to talk to me until i changed the name back to the regular way. Thas why i had to do that whole declaration and what not. Agh, its too much work taking care of a kuya! theyre so many things you gotta do to keep them happy! But i guess you gotta do, wha you gotta do! haha

Work was aiight, it was kinda a busy day. I was relieved that my boss ddint talk to me bout the whole contract supevisor thing. On wed. it was a bit of an awkward moment cuz well last week i asked the clerk if i could be the contract supervisor for the sadies dance this fri. It was for westerns and i wanted to do it cuz i knew the skool and id know errone there, plus i wanted to get my boogie on. Ya know cuz its been forever since i went to a hs dance. haha So she told me yes, so on wed. i was confirming the hours for it. Then my boss overheard and he questioned it. Then he asked her how i was going to get paid and then my other boss came and didnt knwo anything bout it cuz it was something the clerk and i worked out. I guess she forgot, that the three of them came to an agreement, rec leaders cant do contract supervisor events. So i was worried that my main supervisor was going to get mad @ me cuz i didnt ask him if i could or talk to him bout it. But he never did talk to me bout it, so that was a relief! whew

I had a grip of kids in my chef's club today, some of those girls juss irritate me and i was wanna agh!! i gotta get back into the habit w/working w/large number of children again. See before, i was use it, then when i started my program i didnt have that many children. Now my program is really growing, getting new kids errday. I guess i juss gotta be patient w/them and take deep breaths. So we made yesterday, berry bagles and a rootbeer float. The bagels was fun, you cut a bagel, add cream cheese, then top off w/fruit. Then the rootbeer float is self explanatory. After we made it, we delievered it to the important people of the city. The city manager, adminstrative director, my supervisors, the city clerk. Gotta work the politics, ya heard!! Its great cuz the city manager knows my name and talks to me.

I ended up closing for work, the first time in a long time. My boss was called and informed that his grandma had a heart attack. Please pray for her and their family as well. Came home then ate a little bit of adobo chicken, then rushed over to SRE. Mm the other day, we had popeyes chicken and my mom bought cat fish and it was OOoh so good! They were shaped like stars and it had a little spice to it, which added flava! mmm it soudns good right now! wooo class went well, cuz we talked botu the gospel and how you approach the question of, "are you saved?" We talked bout faith and good works going hand in and hand.

It was funny in the beginning of the lesson we talked bout risks and i asked the kids to talk bout a time where they took a risk. Then i asked achie when was a time she took a risk. I wasnt paying attention at first cuz i was doing somethin in the front. Anyway, she talked bout the time when she rode w/his guy to the "goodbye, goodmen conference." She mentioned how he drove a black 2 door civic. How she took the risk driving w/the guy cuz he drives crazy. It finally hit me who she was talking bout later on! haha i felt retarted! haha then i said jokingly, "miss jenn, you know its a sin to exaggerate right?" haha she goes no im not exaggerating! haha ahh people juss dont understand my oh so "non-chalant" driving skills! hahaha

Went home to gather up some pics for the scrapbook nite. I didnt have time to print out some, so i ended up juss taking wha i had on my bulletin board. Good thing, we rescheduled it cuz to next week cuz it gives me time to print some out. Like use different ones from all the different events that took place. Its fun looking at pictures and juss recapturing that moment in time. I juss realized now i shoudl copy and paste this to like an email before i loose my whole entry. Which would lead to me getting pissed and irritated if that were to happen. Ahh there i pasted it on to notepad, that way i dont loose it. I had to paste it to an email too, in case i got one of those error messages and wha not. agh those things suck!

Played w/magic mic @ the soratorios for while. It was coo, jennif and i did a couple of duets on there. Like crusin and endless love and i got to sing some songs i wanted to try. After uprm minus two, went over to molca salsa to eat. This time we didnt seee ko-re-ans all dressed up talking bout their winnings w/pyramid schemes. El huego and kuya made up a new dumb prayer as a piggy back off of my, grace before meals prayer. It goes like, "come lord jesus be our guest, come lord jesus i love _____." then they made another one too, that had the same exact beginning except the ending goes, "i hope and pray that i ____ will kiss me one day." Something like that, its gay! haha i cant believe those two. Then i ended up gagging and throwing up cuz el huego mentioned something sick! i dont know if i can eat molca salsa anymore, it gets to be too salty for me. Maybe its cuz i had it for two days in a row.

OH! so i was put into this awkward moment yesterday. I was at work, and i get this phone call from out of the blue. IT was #32 from the football them, calling me. He called me twice, so when i finally called him back after i took the kids outside. He was like "hey wassup, ja$on, its #32, dua, from the football team." i said, "oh hey wassup..." Dua, went on explaining to me how he's in some kind of financial situation right now. That he needed $$ to get back to skool and he needed a co signer for something. I was caught off guard and well good thing my kids were acting up at the time, so i told him i had to call him back. Agh, i dont like it when youre tying to talk to someone and speak so soft you cant hear them! its like speak up kid, i cant hurr ya! So i had to call him back cuz i didnt know what to say. In the back of my mind, i knew i was going to say no already. The hard part was saying it to him in a loving way. Besides that i thought id get more info. from on wah he needed the $$ for when id call him back.

I called my political advisor who was in midway city at the time. I told him were gonna live there then i said no cuz theres nothing there in midway city. Then he told me yes were gonna live in midway city cuz he makes the rules. haha whatta crazy day! I explained to him my little awkward situation and i asked him wha to i tell him. He give me advice on wah to say to him and how to say it. Well before him i called jeanne, but she dindt pick up. By the time i was done talkign to my political advisor, she called me. So i told her wha happened and i guess he called her too, but she didnt pick up cuz she didnt know whos # it was. She told me #32 told her on tues. that he makes a lot of $$ and wha not. I then learned he was trying to get her into one of those pyramid schemes.

So i called him back and i told him due to my own financial instability i cannot co sign for him. Though i'll pray that he finds someoen to help him out. I asked how come he doesnt ask his parents and he told me he didnt want them to know about it. Later el huego put two and two together which makes four and said #32 needed the loan amount of $2500(though #32 explained he was going to use $1500 of it and return the rest of it.) #32 needed the money to get into the pyramid business, so he can attempt to make $$. I dont know for sure if thas the reason why but im going to assume thas why.
its like one of those scooby doo mysteries that you gotta try and solve. hahah

well i think im going to end it hurr, im starving like marvin! Besides that i need to get ready for the day still. So until next time, stay healthy, oh wait you know if i were to co sign for it, id be like signing my life away! sheessh wha happens if the guy quits going to prayer meeting or what not. I was weirded out by him calling me and asking me for that. i didnt give my cell phone # for those reasons! ha geez i wouldnt even ask kuya to co sign a loan for me! oh well, whatever floats your boat or finds your lost remote. The guy is still young and perhaps we was acting on impulse. oh btw hey kuya we should be in that video, "juss the two of us." haha you know the will smith song! hahahah thas funny

"Just the two of us, we can make it if we try, Just the two of us, Just the two of us, building castles in the sky
Just the two of us, you and I..." im done, im out God bless!

"Never be in a hurry; do everything quietly and in a calm spirit. Do not lose your inner peace for anything whatsoever, even if your whole world seems upset. "-St. Frances de Sales

Agh! to the whole world and their mothers, i hijo declare that from now on then name "kuya" is spelled "kuya" and not "kooya." This has been declared on this twenty-seventh day in March, two thousand and three.

"cuz the whole world loves it when you sing that new song..." im done, im out God bless!

"In dangerous valleys and hazardous pathways, the true neighbor will lift some bruised and beaten brother to a higher and more noble life."

The basic message its saying, you gotta give before you get. Plant your seeds before you reap the harvest. The universal law works in giving you back more than you have sown. When you reap and give to others, youll find yourself blessed. The more you reap, the more you sow. He who has obtains has little, he who scatters has more. Nature does not give to those who will not spend. You only get to keep what you give away. YOu have to give before you get.

I cant wait till the weekend comes, it juss feels like the weeks are so long! Maybe not anymore now that i have no more class on wed. nites! wooo! thas so relaxing juss to know i have 2 free week nites again! I wanted to rent a skurry movie but by the time we go out of molca salsa it was too late. Anyway, hmm whatd i do today, let me think. Went to mass this morning, father brennan presided mass yesterday and today. Went home and then argued w/kooya bout the new spelling of this name. He told me he didnt like the new modernized change. He also told me he wasnt going to acknowledge me if i say kooya. haha i guess imma have to find another kuya! wanted: a fun, loving kuya who will take care of his hijo. hahaha jk i cant replace my kuya, i love kuya like a fat kid loves chocolate!

Well wha else happened, went to skool which was the usual. Took a math test came home for a little bit. Talked to kuya some more online. agh i had to apologize to him for using kooya. haha then wha happened went to phil was boring, took some quiz. I gotta study for my midterm in that class this weekend. Went to work and that was a busy day. Did commodities, good thing errthang was already done and what not. Suprisingly we had less food, and less people this month. Its weird its always a different number errmonth. its changes it goes up and down up down. Then i showed the new girl how to do a hall rental, i had her do it. I was rushing cuz i had to go meet up @ skool w/kooya.

Went to skool and dropped the cis class w/kooya. Came home and i was watching south park and part of the dave chappelle show. strider and kooya came over and we watched the laker game, waiting for el huego to get off of skool. Then we went to molca salsa which was fun! we talked about like skurry movies, i started to get chills listening to them juss imagining them in my head. Then we talked about how other people have had skurry encounters. I was getting a little bit of chills hearing all the different stories. Like how dominic saw the devil at his own house. ahhh thas skurry! forreal forreal thas like whoa! Interesting thing happened later as we were outside talking. Im sure youll read it off kooya and striders blog as well.

So the 4 of us were outside talking about pyramid schemes, you know 2by2.net and all of them programs. Where they get young people like me, and hs students to convince them to make $$. I went to a 2by2.net meetnig before, the meeting was like forevr long and i was getting bored. Of course it sounded coo, but at the same time so unrealistic. ANyway, these korean hs kids were outside talking as well. I guess thye over kooya talk about 2by2 so they come and ask us if we are part of it. Kooya told them no, but hes heard of people getting scammed by them. It was funny cuz right when we came outside and kooya saw them he knew they were part of those groups and probably juss got out of a meeting. They were all dressed up all nice, professional looking.

We make small talk w/the guys telling them to be careful and wha not. They tell us bout their vision one program theyre in. How they have contracts w/big comps like att & t, sprint, nextel, cingular, etc. PLus they have the top lawyer defending them on their side. We were juss like okay thas coo, juss we could entertain them. We asked if they were making $$ and one kid said yeah they were making a lot. Ha fuunny thing is, they all left in the end all in one car, it was a toyota camry. I was a bit nervous when they approached us cuz i thought they were looking for trouble. THen they were real coo w/us juss wanting to know info. bout 2by2.net. We were all waiting for them to try to market us into their program. That was pretty interesting talking to them and juss listening to them. They asked how we were and when they found out kooya is 23, they kinda stepped back. Kooya told them they were only bebes cuz theyre still in hs. hahaha

i got to talk to raymond from carson tonite, hes my apologetics partner in crime. We graduated apologetics together last semester. It really helped me out knowing that i was taking it w/someone i knew. Anywya he;s a funny guy, he told me this...
Shi6no9bi: what are you
Shi6no9bi: are you mixed???
JPFish187: yeah im filipino and white
JPFish187: im mestizo
Shi6no9bi: I HATE YOu
Shi6no9bi: take'n all the women
Shi6no9bi: hehe
Shi6no9bi: jp
JPFish187: hahaha
JPFish187: whatever i wish i had some
Shi6no9bi: hehe
Shi6no9bi: PCN
JPFish187: haha
Shi6no9bi: you never know
JPFish187: true
Shi6no9bi: say you have Jess Moya notes

Skurry story i was telling el huego and stider in the car. Like 3 or 4 new years eves ago, i was @ my grandmas house. Well my whole fam bam tribe was there too as well. Anywya, for those who dont know my grandparents only live right around the corner from me. That nite, this popo was trying to get this guy for speeding. The car was trying to get away so it was like a small chase. All of a sudden next thing we hurr is him gonig into the corner brick house @ the end of my street. HE went drove up the little hill, where the neighbors who live there, have their camper there. ANyway he up that curb and almost hit the camper. He than ran out of the car into the skool field.
Then you had popos all over the street looking for the guy. I was skurred cuz it was on my street.

im exhausted imma go sleep, another long day tomorrow. Hopefully it'll go by fast, thurs always seem to go the slowest @ work. Especially in the afternoons, i feel like it juss drags! agh Im running out of personal stories to write on blog! haha

"Get on your feet, up and make it happen..." im done, im out God bless!

"Don't wait for the right person to come into your life but be the right person to come into someone's life."

wow this quote made me think a lot when it was given to me last nite. When i first read it, i only thought of it pertaining to bf/gf relationships. Now that i look at it again, it pertains to many different things. I guess the simplest way to see is, the bf/gf one. How so many people look for the "right person" the person that would fit their defintion of a "mr./ms. right." THough until now i realized you cant juss sit and wait for your princess or prince to arrive juss as LL cool J had said. You could be that right person to walk into someone;s life and juss totally change it unexpectedly. So basically you cant always focus errthang on "you." You could be a gift or a blessing to another persons life. Same goes w/friends too, dont sit around and wait till you find the right crowd to chill with. Be the person that will help change the wrong crowd into the right.

Ha i was juss thinking of something in the car on my way home from mcdonalds. Its actually a funny story, well to me it is. Errtime i watch that movie mulan it reminds me so much of this girl i was so crushin on for the longest time. I dont remember if i told this story already in a previous entry. I guess if i did, oh well im sure not erreone would remember it. ANyway, my cousin use to work at the edwards theatres in westminister. By the way, that theatre no longer exsists there. So he was the asst. mananger of that theatre. It was d0pe cuz id always be the first one to see all the latest movies. On the weekends or whenever i had no skool id go and spend the day @ work w/him. Id bring my big ol cup and my little tupperware thing to get popcorn.

Well there was this girl there and her name was zena. So errtime id go to see a movie, id talk to her and what not. I was i think 15 at the time and she was 18. She was 5'5 w/brown eyes, smiled like the sunrise haah jk . No forreal she was like 5'5 short black shoulder length hair. Pretty much looked like mulan to me. So i guess picture her looking like that. Errtime id talk to her id get all excited, and then id wait in hurr line to my drink refill juss so we can talk. Ha this is gay i know but id even go the point where id go into the bathroom and dump my drink out and then come back later for a refill. Or when id go to see a movie w/my fam bam tribe, id look in the parking lot to see if hurr car was there. i ended up finding out later she only lived right around the corner from me.

ANyway, my cousin quick the theatre cuz he got a better job. Which meant that i woudlnt see zena anymore cuz that was my only way of seeing her. Well time passed and errthang, soon before i knew it was a jr. Prom was coming up and i think the thought of her came into mind. One day i decided well since i hadnt talked to her in forever i wanna go see her. it was 042499 so i was pacing back & forth debating whether i was going to do this or not. I finally did and i rang the door bell and at the time my cousin's cousin(so i guess 2nd cousin) mom was dating zena's dad at the time. So basically my aunt opens the door and we do small talk. After all the long anticipation the moment comes and i ask if zena is home.

At the time errone in my fambam knew i had this thing for her and they all told me she had a bf. Of course me liking her and all, i didnt want to believe it. This is sad part, i made up this lie pretty much so i can get a pic of her. I told her i had to do this eng. proj and i needed to ask 15 different people whom i didnt know too well wha love meant to them. I think she read right through my lie cuz she was kinda puzzled why i asked her. All of a sudden we dont talk in a long period of tmie and next thing you know, im @ her door. ahh my foot fell asleep!
So she writes down her response for me saying this, "Love is a very misunderstood concept. Although many people believe they are in love, they really arent. A very concreate example is the unbelieveably high divorce rate of the last two decades.I may sound very cynical about romance but love really does suck!"

Wow i cant believe i still have that little note. Then i told her i needed a picture also, but she told me she didnt look good so to come back another day. I come back another day and her bf was there. At that time i was still i denial about her having one, and plus her negative response bout love. Whenever id pass by her house there would be a black toyota truck there. Thas how i knew whether her "bf" was there or not. So when i was there, he pulls up and im thinking oh why?! She intro. me to him but didnt say it was her bf. As i was bout to take the pic. the camera gets all jacked up. I felt really embarassed and stuff cuz her "bf" was there too. Being the camera wasnt working she juss gave me one of those photo maker pics she took i guess a couple weeks before. I was all excited and happy when i got it. Actually she had me borrow it and told me i had to return it. i go home and i scan it right away and print it out. haha i don got the pic anymore though, i ended up throwing it away. It got ruined from one of my frames i had.

Weeks later before prom comes, i decide after getting encouragement from a friend whom i was close to at the time to ask. I go over there and i remember i ended up waking her up from her nap. On 050799, i went over there and then i pretty much bluntly asked her if she could go w/me. I remember i had hinted to her bout it the first time we talked. She told me her prom experience wasnt very memorable cuz the guy wasnt very gentlemen like and besides that after prom he boned out on her. This was in the pi too, cuz she went to hs there. Well the main reason i went over to her house was to follow up and say the eng proj i lied bout went well. Then i asked her to prom and it was amazing cuz she said yes! haha she invited me in and told me bout some dress she already had from sears.

Prom was coo, except she was late picking me up! i guess she was having probs as she was getting her hair professionaly done. We danced and ate @ the mac grill w/some of our other friends. We took pics and blah blah the usual. At the end she was tired and we juss went to the norms to get dessert. I wanted to go to some party w/my other friends btu she didnt want to. wha could i do, she drove and was my date too! ha Wha was crazy was the day after prom my little "crush" ended. I didnt like her anymore, those feelings of butterflies were all gone.

So thas my story for today! my feet hurt ive been on it all day! Wha happened today, i went to mass really tired. Though after i felt waken up and i wasnt tired anymore. Talked to kuya online as i usually do err morning. I said to him kuya is...then he had to fill in the blank. ha so he put kuya is yummy! haha then i said yummy huh like yummy boba and he said heck yah. haha Then i was talking ot jaymee forever on the phone. Went to go rent mulan for work. You know if she was a real life person, i bet you shed look d0pe! oh hurr is another of those if you really know me...If you really knew me youd know that i loved that movie the debut and that girl joy bisco is oh so hot! woooo

Work was alright, i finally got to see the slideshow from yesterdays luncheon. Went to an elementary skool to talk bout camp stanton coming up. I hope i was able to convice at least some kids to go. As of now, no one has signed up for it. Which totally bites cuz i dont know what'll happen if we dont get sign ups. Agh that week is gonna be so tiring cuz we have the big egg hunt for work also that sat before easter. Then the next day is easter...agh! Work on commodities all day long, pretty much. Thas why my feet hurt, though we got it all done today. I had help from my kids and some parents. I really enjoy working w/the new girl shes outgoing adn easy to talk to. I invited her to come to prayer meeting also.

Went home to eat, then went to the blessed sacrament for a little bit. Prayer meeting was chill, the usual amount of people there. Though we did have a new guy there this time. He fit into the "elders" catagory. Then after went to mcdonalds for the usual fellowship. It was fun, we ate told jokes enjoyed each others company. boss lady came too which made it even more exciting! Speaking of her, she looked really pretty tonite. She had a whole spring motiff thing going on. The colors, the capri pants errthang was juss shouting out its spring time!

Kuya and i are most likely going to drop our Cis class. he was informed today by a csulb cousnelor he was wasting his time w/that class. So we figured we mine as well juss drop it. Then we could juss chill on wed. nites, which i dont mind. It'll help ease my mind and not stress on tues. nites bout whether our hw was done or not. No more going to the labs and my days will be like mon nites. ahh yes, it was fun while it lasted though. I guess now i know wha its like to take a class w/kuya. FRom now on kuya is gonna be spelled kooya, the hijo lingo. Please take note of the minor change in the spelling!

Then strider, el huego and kooya were all outside of mcdonalds talking forever. Talked bout obeidence to God and living in the present moment. Two important yet hard things to try to remember. agh kooya said brb and he hasnt came back yet. I asked erik de jesus for bess' juss to see if i had the write one or not. Apparently i did, at least it was the same # i tried to call the past couple times. Oh well, whateveas i guess for right now. Well its almost 2am and i should go to rest. ahh look gail juss signed on! Enjoy this long entry again, i think im picking up the pace again! haha woo i cant wait to spend the week @ kooyas!

"And youer the kind of girl i think about,and youre the kind of girl i dream bout im done. My heart is telling me that i need you in my world. Cuz youre my kinda lady, youre my kind of girl." im done, im out God bless!

"Good nature begets smiles, smiles begets friends and friends are better than a fortune..."

YOu know, It's often the simple heartfelt gesutres in life today speak most loudly of friendship. Ask yourself today, "what can i do to bring a smile to the face of a friend? What can i do to bring a good cheer into the life of someone who is need, trouble, sickness or sorrow?" Follow through on your answer. It's not a gfit you are giving as much as a friendship you are building! So those are my two cents for today, goodnite errone! haha

agh i had like 3 paragraphs typed up and then i accidently pushed ctrl+a and then i typed something and i lost my whole entry! agh i hate that, booo!!! Anyway, i realized i have so much going on in my life, i need to make sure i get enough rest. During the weekdays, i dont get much rest at all, cuz im always going to bed late. Tonite i wont be able to go to sleep till 2am, then wake up @ 730am for mass. My weekdays are so hectic cuz errthang is back to back to back. I dont have time to really rest except on mon. nites. I gotta try and do blog earlier in the evening so i can at least be done w/it by 12am. We'll how it goes, but then i get caught up also talking to other people while doing blog @ the same time. ahh the joy of sleepin in till 12pm!

I had this crazy dream this morning when i woke up. I kinda jotted them down as notes. Oh yeah theyre two different types of dreams also. A lot of it isnt even really clear cuz well i cant remember errthang. This is wha happened though, errone i guess was going out some place and boss lady wanted to go. She asks if she can go out, she's told no for some reason. Boss lady gets upset cuz she wants to go but she cant. Then i remember kuya driving off cuz he ahd to go home and change or something. he ends up coming back to spend time w/boss lady. Then the second part is i guess in sunny hills theatre, i see people i know but their faces arent clear. I end up getting stabbed somehow and then the paramedics come. It was a pretty skurry dream!

I was so tired i wanted to go mass @ 830am @ St. I. Though i remembered it was adoration so i had to go @ 8am @ SpV. I went to mass then came home and i slept for little while, i need to attempt to catch up w/my rest. Checked my mail, sent out my daily lent stuff and checked out wha was happening w/the war. Its so disturbing to watch anything on tv now, it makes juss frustrated and like agH.

Went to class, phil was boring as usual. The discussion was about free will and some other boring stuff. I was playing snake, while the guy next to me was paying his bills off. I was happy i got there like 5 before class started and i found parking right away! wooo praise God! Went home to check mail and talk to boss lady briefly online before leaving to work. Agh we got stupid commodities to pack @ work tomorrow. At least i know i wont be alone tomorrow packing them. Its boring when there is no one to talk to when im doing that. Though lyn² seems to enjoy donig them, i told her how i get bored cuz i have no one to talk to. She suggested to me that i pray.

Lyn² started to turn the senior lounge into her new "preskool playtime" activity classroom. You guys gotta come and see it. its so nice and colorful and w/all the posters on the walls. Its soo d0pe! her and my other co worker did a d0pe job. By the time its done, its gonna look so bright and juss wow! i liked how she's hanging stars from the ceiling. Her bulletin boards are nice too! we need to get more butcher paper like different color ones to do more boards. We only have like orange and white, well hardly any white left. I guess next time we all take a trip down to stanton, yall can check it out. By that time the room should be up and running too.
Her classes are going to go so well, i can tell already! Im excited and so proud of her! Im glad they were able to hire her! She juss so creative and what not!

My class today was a bit hectic though. The kids were suppose to be working on their lyp syncs, instead i get a lot of drama. Man the boys and girls club dont have any sense of discipline @ all. Thas why my kids are all wound up and juss like whatever. They didnt even really accomplish anything in my class today at all. Mostly messed around and got mad @ each other. Though im tryign ot be patient cuz i dont want to loose these kids, cuz theyre the only ones i got! haha its so hard to kids too, thas why i gotta learn to be patient and take deep breaths.

After work, i went to visit Jesus @ the blessed sacarament, its adoration so i had to take advantage of the time. So i stayed there for a about half hour or so, i prayed my rosary and juss sat and looked @ Jesus. I guess kuya went straight to my casa after he got out of work. haha he called me on my way home asking me wheer i was. He told me he wasnt going to come till like 630pm so i took my time. haha apparently he was excited to hijo! hahaha Kuya comes over and he has dinner @ my house. We had turkey meatloaf and squash. He tried squash for the first time, but it was too swe3t for him. I forgot to tell him to peel off the shell! Then we juss messed around and aruged back and forth like we always do. He was making fun of me cuz i had on my cork board of pics, the little movie card to the "flip side." My old neighbors who lived right next door to us for the longest time came over and visited also. it was nice to see them cuz gee i havent seen them in forever long. IT was a nice little suprise for them to come to visit.

Well i made another attempt again to call. Once again i got the vmail and it was some girl talking. Though she was speaking so fast that i didnt understand whos # i called. I didnt wanna call it again cuz, the person whos ever it was might think im weird. haha So i was flusterred cuz i got the wrong # or i think i did at least. i asked darwin from SOl if he knew the #. He gives me some other # thas 909 area code which i thought didnt seem like the right one. I called it anyway and i got some girl name rebecca's vmail. After that last call i was like agh!

Small little chit-chat w/kuya bout the whole phone call situation. I have to call cuz i feel like i cant be content w/myself until i talk to her. Its juss one of those things where i feeel like i have to do. Like errone else had said i should wait till she calls me, though how is that suppose to happen if i keep getting the wrong #. Then him, jeanne and el huego said its not meant to be. El huego brought up a good point tonite, that made me think. He said sometimes God shields us from getting hurt, cuz he knows before hand someone might get hurt. So in order to prevent that, He tries to stop us. Though we dont want to listen so we do it anyway and learn the hard way. Then el huego said i shoudl jsus wait for the youf rally and ask for it there. it was ncie cuz he said he doesnt want to see me get hurt over this i guess.

Anyway kuya told me that someone once told him, that in order to get over something, you gotta say no. Easy said but the words being said conveys much truth. In order to give up something, juss say no. Then he brought up an example. HE said you do something and then it makes you frustrated causing you to sin. Therefore the only way to deal w/that temptation is to say no. The more you say no, the moer it becomes a habbit. Leading me to eventually not want to call her. Kuya also related to the who moved my cheese story, how the story relates to not only the iob style but lifestyle as well. I cant stay in one place but i gotta explore and look for more opportunities. Which is something jeanne told me tonite too. I should keep my opitions open cuz if i keep focusing on that one person (whom we all know), then i might be missing our on someone else.

There are some questions i need to answer for myself and to really think about. I took kuyas ending advice and i delted the # from my phone, then when i see her @ the youf rally ill ask for it. If it's God's will that she becomes available for me to at least talk to her. Well see wha happens but i guess in the meantime i need to focus on trusting in God and answering those questions for myself.

Talked to my AOl best friend tonite, ti was coo cuz we havent talked on the phone in forever. ha we remicised on all the different things that took place in our lives. Liek the bet we made last year and now i owe her teddy crafters some clothes. Or the time when she wrote to me in hawaii, the risk i advised her to take. ha how she found $$ to go to winter formal in her locker @ skool. To this day she still doesnt know who gave her that money to go. Ha or the time her and i went to starbucks over the summer, she saw her cousin there. HEr cousin asked her if i was her bf and she was like no. haha we bof laughed cuz she's like 12(not really, more less 15). Im like 20 so im like 5 years younger then she is. haha she wrote this bout that time we chilled in her dead journal.

"-i went home cleaned a little did a buncha nothing then talked online and jason offered to go to starbux and we ended up going
-we went to starbux but i went to cold stone and i saw my cousin nicole, christian and carlo. my cousin christian didn't member me but whatever. i haven't seen that lil boy in like YEARS.... jason and i went to goldilocks and he checked out more girls and bought some polveron. hahaha. yep yep"

oh the memories! or how i went to her cousin mary;s birfday party too cuzi was invited. hah iwas stuck there w/a bunch of hs freshmen girls. I was the oldest one there, it was weird i dont knwo why i went. haha I lost playing dollars to this one ghett0 chick. Though my cousin ended up winning it back for me! woo I love my aol best friend, she's so fun to talk to! wha up heif! hope youre reading this really long entry! haha thanks for all the good times!

Went to dennys w/el huego tonite for a little bit. Saw an old hs friend there also, i invited her to prayer meetng but she had some bbq to go to tomorrow. OH well, though ti wouldve been coo if she went. I got fries and ranch though i shouldnt of even gotten it. I dont know why i knew i wasnt really hungry, but i got food anyway. Came home and talked to reirich for a while online. He gave me a good quote to use for tomorrow's entry. Well thas it for now, i gotta long day tomorrow! please keep me in your prayers, i hope nothing bad happens tomorrow!

"Doesn't really matter what the eye is seeing, Cause I'm in love with the inner being. And it doesn't really matter what they believe, what matters to me is you're in love with me..." im done, im out God bless!

"Two incredibly powerful words: 'thank you.' "

To me this is something important, to always try to remember to say thank you. So often sometimes i forget to say thanks or to show my appreciation. Though im forever grateful of whatever is done to me. I try to show my appreciation as much as i can to others. I think something to always say thanks for, is juss waking up to a start of a brand new day. You never know when your time may be up and juss liek that you could be gone. Whoa thas a skurry thought to think about. Speaking of skurry i think it was last week, i was taking a shower getting ready for skool. I heard a noise like someone walking into the house and i got skurred cuz i had this ugly vision of something happening to me. It was skurry cuz i was home bymyself and the bathroom door was closed. ANyway, sorry back on track dont meant to skurr errone first thing in the morning. I know many of you read this first thing when you get to work. Showing appreciation doesnt even have to be done by materialistic things, juss by saying the two words.

So after a long nite @ carson, i return home back to my own community. Went to mass this morning, and the lector read the first reading twice! i dont understand how she didnt realize as she started to read it, that she read it twice. She didnt even end up reading the second reading, at all. Though maybe God was telling her to reemphasize the first reading. Cuz the first reading was pretty important, dealing w/the ten commandments. Father asked errone to repeat the ten commandments @ mass this morning. No one really except for a few and the children;s choir remebered them. Im sure Father brennan wasnt too suprised that not a lot of people knew, yet frustrated at the same time.

OoH i forgot to add in last nites entry, we upgraded our sattelite plan. So now we got more channels to choose from and on top of that we have bet now! haha i know that probably sounded ghett0 but i use to watch bet a lot. They always had some interesting shows on there. NOw i can watch like 106 and park now and other such shows. A lot of times bet comes out w/the new videos before mtv does, so thas another reason why bet is coo.

Went w/to music ministry practice today after getting in n out for lunch. mm it was good cuz i havent had in n out for a while. Actually i take that back, i think the week before lent i had in n out when i had gone w/el huego. We practiced the songs for the SOL rally and for the thing on thurs. nite also. Went w/lyn² to conroys to pick up the flowers for work. Then we went to work and attempted to work on it by ourselves. Only it didnt really work out that way. Well actually lyn² done more then i did, she filled up the bowls and what not. I sat around snacking on errthang we had work. Then we bof ended up snacking on like candy and ice cream.

Then errone else came which really helped out cuz i was feeling kinda stressed even though it wasnt my proj. Cuz i didnt know how we were going to get it done, but lyn² was right she told me, "God will help us." And she was right, we did end up finishing it. W/the help of God, aela and achie, they fluffed the flowers and totally juss made it all nice. whew, lyn² had to get vases @ the 99 cents store, soo good thing that store was open late too. I felt bad i didnt even do anything, i ended up playing 'rounders' at the other end of the table. haha we played black jack for a little bit. Then moved over to play poker, where strider was upset cuz he bet too high and lost all his earnings. After i was feelin to play pusoy dos, so we played one game w/arch and mizike. I asked strider to put down and hahah the expression on hsi face was so funny. He was like all frustrated from loosing to poker.

Went to the soratorios to sing on magic mic. ahh it felt nice to see the old friend again! i havetn seen him in a while. it was fun errone was singing and laughing, enjoying themselves. it was great a feeling to be w/errone again. Lately i guess errone has been busy so we all ahvent actually all chilled together in a long time. I cant wait till summer is hurr cuz then we can all chill late nite, errnite! wooo then i cant wait till my birfday! oh man oh man oh man im gonna be 21 woooo! then i can do errthang, im soo going to vegas and hitting up errthing i can my hands into! forreal, forreal i aint even gonna sleep! though i wanna have errone w/me on my birfday, meaning i wanna celebrate it w/errone! hmm my birfday lands on a sat. this year, so maybe i can have a huge celebration on sat. Then the following weekend go to vegas or something like that. Well see wha God has in store for me! =) wow im excited juss talking bout it!

I made a new online buddy tonite! wooo Im telling you, AOL brings people together, forreal thas partly how i became of the community. If mizike had never imed me that one day, then id be lost in the streets someplace in some kind of gang. haha no im being dramatic, though my life would be a lot different w/o errone in it. anyway so i get this im saying "hi." At first im very hmm i guess defensive and paranoid thinking it might be someone trying to mess w/my head by perpin. Ends up that its Tim from oxnard's gf who i was talking to. She was asking me to send my daily lent devotions ot him on the ship. He;s in the navy and i guess juss left for the middle east or is on the way there. HOw skurry...man the whole middle east thing trips me out.

its sad how our soliders were captured and then tortured and even killed. On top of that they show it on tv for errone to see. agh that hurts me and only makes me angry. It only makes me more glad that we are over there cleaning up their country. i wonder what'll happen if they end up catching sadaam, whoa thatd be pretty crazy if they did. Kuya and i are at peace cuz of the geneva conference truce. I cant touch him and he cant touch me under those rules. I find it hard for me to stay @ peace, when i jsus wanna attack and go all out! ahhh haha let the "hi-joe" come out and fight! haha

So anyway back to the girl, i guess thas tim's gf. Shes really nice, shes part of SOL's community. Though i dont remember seeing her all the times ive been there. She said shes still new to her community. I told her to come our prayer meetings sometimes and i linked her up to our website. I wonder if she ended up signing the guestbook. I told her too and she was skurred cuz she doesnt know anyone and she's signing our guestbook. I reassured it was alright cuz i had doen the same thing before in the past. I hope she can make it to our prayer meetings, thatd be cool.

i was lookign back this morning at my hold hs yearbook. I bought erryear, i mean i mine as well. Its incomplete to get one year and then not the year after that. And as i was reading back at the things people said to me, a tear came to my eye. haha jk though it made me smile a lot and juss laugh looking back at those times. ahh hurrs one entry i use to read over and over again, especially after it was signed.. ::sigh::
"2 fish head...thanks for creepin into my 4th period class to give me this book. We have all their inside jokes and weve already had one week 'anniversary-" which was yesterday haha jk youve been a nice guy. (were cool sophmorees) now im gonna be glad that youre gone. jk im babblin! you owe me free stuff. jk i play w/you too much. See whenever dork... i know youll be seeing me cuz that damn camera ;s everywhere. Im done love always anne milo. hs ahh yes the memories of fun n the son!

"You're the reason why I found my way. And you're the reason why I feel this way. And you're the reason why I have to say...I had to let you know you're my everything..."im done, im out God bless!

A True Friend Is...
someone who knows when you are upset.
someone who won't let you get away without talking about it.
someone who will risk their life to make sure you don't up and die on them.
someone who you can call up at 10:30 at night no matter how small your problem.
someone who instead of going with the "big group" will go with you when you feel bad.
someone who can just let you be when you need time alone.
someone who goes out of their way to make sure you're happy.
someone who always has a shoulder for you to cry on if need be.
someone who if you do cry on their shoulder won't go and tell the world.
someone who puts your happiness equal to theirs and not less than theirs

that little poem thing speaks for itself pretty much. I hope i hold at least some of those characteristics of being a good friend. Anyway, i didn't get to blog last nite cuz i was too tired after coming home from the LbC. Yesterday was a pretty coo day, hey did yall know thurs. was the first day of spring? woooo thas why its been oh so hot the past couple days. ITs coo, id rather have hot weather then cold weather like rain and what not. So i sit hurr eating my oreos and milk that ive wanted since thurs. nite. See i was telling lyn² this in the car on fri. I have to eat oreos w/milk, i cant have it w/o each other. For example, i cant eat the oreos by itself, cuz it juss doesnt work that way for me. Oreos and milk are great!

Since thurs. marked the first day of spring, i started to spring clean. We cleaned up our backyard and the side of the house. Oh man my oreo juss drowned inside my milk awww heck! i hate when that happens, cuz then i gotta wait to it all melts in the very bottom. I finally cleaned the inside and outside of my car yesterday also. agh my car was filfthy inside and outside. It feels to drive a clean car now, especially looking at in inside while youre driving. When its not dusty anymore and what not. Went to the westminister mall to go to old navy there. It was kinda weird not going to kuyas work cuz usually when i go to that mall thas what i go there for.
Speakign of the kid, he tagged my board w/his oh so hm catchy song he made up. Ahhh now i got it stuck in my head again.

I went to the bp mall to get some stuff and so i since my fam bam tribe wanted rubios for dinner, i said id stop by to get some. I figured it was right by the mall anyway, but i was wrong! agh it was baja fresh so theh i had do drive clear across the other side to katella. I wanted ot check out the thirft shop over there, but it was closed! Left to go meet up w/strider @ his house in the LbC. We went to prayer meeting in carson over @ love and faith. man its been like forever since ive gone there. THough it did feel nice being back to my other community again. It was great seeing errone again, people whom i havent seen in ages. I guess it was weird cuz marylou and raymond were talking bout our community on the way over to their prayer meeting. They were saying how they hadnt seen kuya or me or anyone in sh for a while. Later when she came in and she saw us, she was like whoa! okay i juss checked my blog book and the last time i had gone to carson was w/kuya on jan. 4. haha thas cool blog book helps so i can easily look back for reference on things i wrote about!

So prayer meeting in carson was tight, i love their praise & worship songs. In fact strider heard one i guess we use to have or we have but no one uses it. Then i found one i heard that i heard before on my fcfc cd. im feelin the song! im glad i have the song cuz ive been listening to it all morning. Anthoneezy fo sheezy was prayer leader last nite and it was good. He's got some d0pe vokals forreal, forreal no doubt! Him and leo got some pretty d0pe vokals, i told strider we should use them for our music minisry too. Their closing song, made me change my closing song. Actually i changed my whole warm up line up, so im using o magnify the Lord, lulaley and let the fire fall. Haha it was funny cuz when l & f was singing o magnify the Lord theirs is different. Instead of singing, "hosanna, blessed be the rock..." like us, theirs is "The Lord reigns, blessed be the rock..." So strider and i were singing the SH way. Haha when i was sitting down this one lady sitting next to me told me i was matching really well.

We played this one game called picture perfect over there too. It was pretty interesting, i think imma use it for my class too. YOu get into groups and each group is assigned a parable. Then you and your group ahve to make a picture scene to explain the 5 main points in the parable. You can onyl talk once though, thas the hard part. Then at the end of the last scene you had to guess what parable was acted out. It was pretty fun, we had the parable of the sums of money. Ours was pretty hard to put together at first, but slowly it came together. its great, cuz i have a d0pe time whenever im there. In fact i think im going to make a switch and be part of their core community. haha jk Raymond and i are trying to put some kind of fellowship picnic together w/our community and theirs.

After prayer meeting we met up w/them for fellowship @ tapioca express. i was listening to raymond and anthoneezy's stand up catholic comedy. haha the jokes were pure comedy i tell ya! Especially the one about casting the first stone! wha else i played pusoy dos w/some of them, though i didnt win. OH which reminds me of another tight memory. That one time when we went to striders co workers daughter's sister's brother n law's parents birfday partty. haha jk i wasnt that long of line of people, juss strider's co workers daughter's. It was a fun, though long day. We went to oxnard's retreat that day, thas when there was that big accident in the middle of the freeway. When strider had to make an emergency stop, then another emergency came and we got mad dogged by the fire fighters. haha Anyway, we had our mini uprm conference that nite. There was jello shots, good bbq and food. THen i played pusoy dos w/some guys, i kept winning too!. i finally left when they played somethign else and it was for $$ too. Oh that same nite i remember, when we all got home, we all made up our uPrM sns! hahaha awww the memories!

Oh that next day, i was really tired but i went to carson for their LSS that same day. Shessh i was errwhere that weekend! agh i was frustrated on my way home last nite from striders. On the 91e they closed like 3 lanes down for construction and had only one open. Which had errone having to merge, which was sooooo inconvient! agh then this old man who made me mad cuz he wouldnt let me merge over to his lane. There was a lot room, but he kept driving up. I finally got over and agh! oOhh last nite when we were @ "taps" haha gail calls tapioca express that. So there was a group of people doign this little game or something? i dont know but i was fun watching them. They were singing a "do run run, a do run run." the object of the game i guess is like this...
JPFish187: how do you play it
DaYsL33pR: u make up a song to it , it goes:
DaYsL33pR: a do run run run a do run run (then u say something here)
DaYsL33pR: then: a do run run run, a do run run (another thing here)
DaYsL33pR: dun dun dun dun, HEY!!! (something short)
DaYsL33pR: then two more times
DaYsL33pR: then u start all over
DaYsL33pR: hehe it has a certain rhythm too

DaYsL33pR: we had almost 30 people @ taps this time
JPFish187: haha thas funny taps
JPFish187: hhaa
JPFish187: is that wha you call it?
DaYsL33pR: hahaha
DaYsL33pR: jus cuz its funny
JPFish187: hahahha
JPFish187: thas funny
DaYsL33pR: and tapioca express IS kinda long
DaYsL33pR: and excessive

aww last nite this one little girl, well she wasnt like 5 or 6 i call her little cuz she was probably like hs still, but lower hs. anyway, i guess their community is doing some kind of youf thing for the confirmation kids. so she asked if i was coming, i told her i wasnt from this parish. Then she said somethign else, i said okay well ill see wha happens. then i think she said something else, but i shouldve invited her to SH. It was a bit different different seeing a variety last nite and not like a football team or anything. haha

Ohh ive been meaning to add this in hurr the past couple days, but id forget. SOme recent significant dates that mean something to me. Theyre not in chronological order, theyre juss @ random, so hurr i go! well these are only ones i can remember.
081401 031502 041302 042001 070102 070502 072102 060100 061800 030301 020902 112902 122902

Well thas it for now, hopefully ill have more to write bout later tonite. if im not too sleepy!

"And Lord we want to Lift your name on high and Lord we want to thank you for the works youve done in our lives..." im done, im out God bless!

"Sometimes you end up with the person you'd never expect to be with. Sometimes it hurts looking back and then moving forward, but as long as you're happy now, insecurities are bound to fade..."

Im running out of quotes hurr, it took me a while to find a good quote. haha soo if you know any send them my way! an old friend of mine wrote this quote, in fact i use to like her back in hs. haha pretty crazy cuz i told her too...well i did after skool was over the chicken way...online. It was the nite right before i was leaving for vacation to minn. It was that sun. right after skool had juss ended. The way i liked her though was kinda different. See, one nite i was online and she had imed me out of the blue. So errday wed talk online forever, and she was really cool. Like a down to earth person, so i fell for her personality before i even saw wha she looked liked. Then when we talked @ skool, the looks came second.

So i told her that i was feelin her right before i left for vacation. oh i remember, i emailed her and told her. yeah i know how gay, haha but i was skurred. i even i think unsent it cuz i was unsure, then i juss said oh well. Then when she came on that nite, i was all nervous. forreal, my hands were kinda sweaty and my puso was beating fast. i didnt im her cuz i was testing to see if things would change, apparently not. She imed me and was like "too cool to say hi?" oh i have the convo printed out and saved, haha these are things i like to look back on and juss laugh. anyway, that nite we carried on a normal convo as usual then right before i was signing off, i told her thanks for being coo bout it. Then she was like no worries, like you said nothing has to change. She told me i appreciate your honesty thanks for keepin it real.

That helped me a lot knowing that like errthang was all good between us. and she was right, nothing did ever change between us. She didnt become weird talking to me, or avoid talking to me or anything like that. So i guess me telling her was like a blessing. 2 years ago, over the summer i took her out to eat @ some korean bbq place in cerritos. It was d0pe cuz we pretty much chilled the whole day. I picked her up from work in long beach , oh i remember i got her like i think it was a purple carnation or rose that day. Anyway, so we ate @ korean bbq cuz she was feelin for it. We had a chillrific time cooking the meat and errthang else together! mmm korean bbq. I dont think id go back to the place cuz we both got up and went to the bathroom. Then while i was waiting for her the people there told me i didnt pay tip. We were both kinda perturbed cuz it was like they were forcing us to pay tip.

After we went to the cerritos mall, to walk off the food. ha i remember we saw like errone that @ the mall. i think she was shopping for a birfday gift for her cousin. So we went into all the different stores, like forever 21 and stores like that. Then we went to the buena park library cuz she was looking for some books for her AP lit class for skool. We ended up hitting up the cypress library one too cuz i guess they didnt have some the ones she needed. I took her back to her cousins house cuz she was spending the nite there. It was a really d0pe day, cuz we bof had a chillrific time, at least i did.

Back to the quote, i really like this quote cuz its reality. Though i cant really relate to it, but its true from what ive seen from toher people. Check it, a lot of times you fall for the person youd least expect to see yourself with. Youre insecure cuz you dont know whether you made the right decision or not. It hurts to look back on the past from the previous relationships, though you gotta move foward w/life as well. Which isnt the easiest things when it comes to ending relationships. But if youre happy now, w/where youre at, the insecurities you have bout yourself are bound to go away.

im sleepy, im trying to make this blog long for kuya cuz he's been complaining that my entries are short. Theyre short cuz i get so tired by the time i start blog. OoOh check this, i found this in a filipino book..."The Phillipines: Pacific Crossroads" by sullivan, margaret W. Why i am soo dark: "In the beginning, God formed the first person just like a cook makes a cookie. Then god put the person on the fire to bake, but God got busy and left the person on too long. That person came out all burned and black." hahah

i found that a long time off of somenoes profile. Its funny i think cuz some filipinos are so dark or get dark too easy. i wanna get darker, that was my goal last summer and i think i did too. Working at the park all day and sitting in the hot sun. I remember errone asking me, "did you get darker?" that whole first week of work errone was asking, did you get darker? haha eww i dont like too much sun cuz then i think start to peel. Like i started to shed and my old skin comes off and i have new skin. haha

today was a busy day, i was craving oreos and milk last nite, but we didnt have any milk, so i had to eat chips instead. So i ate chips till like 230am while watching the news on tv. Went to sleep and i had the craziest dream, bout i dont know wha. I remember beyonce was in it, lyn lyn, boss lady my real boss, kuya and i think some others. it was weird, i woke up and i shouldve written wha happend down. So i was hoping to sleep in but i couldnt sleep in any longer then 930am. Got ready and went w/lyn² to US toys in garden grove. We bought a grip of stuff there for work. Like bulletin board stuff to put up for our programs.

Had lunch w/kuya today, we ate at that chinese restaraunt in westminister. i got to see midway city again! haha midway city is great! We had an overwhelming amount of food left over, so i took it home. lunch was tight, kuyas one funny guy i tell ya! forreal forreal, where would my life be w/o him...i could name a few right now. ha jk much mahal goes to him haha He kept singing some song he made up in the car while i was trying to listen to my fabolous and ashanti. The song went like, "r-o-bb-y, r-o-bb-y he;s so fly, he;s so fly." something like that it was very catchy so its been stuck in my head all afternoon. Kuya sang only like 1200 times! haha

Stopped by the bank, ross and tillys inside the little cypress shopping center. I need to wash my car its so dirty. The wherehouse inside the mall @ westminister is going out of business, so they had errthang liek 60% off, i like going out of business sales! I got my dad this elvis dvd from his first movie, "love me tender." Man i havent watched a strong bad cartooni n forever, i gotta catch up on those. Came home for a little bit, still full from lunch so i didnt eat anything. Besides dinner wasnt even ready yet before i left for mass. Went to mass then talked ot el huego, jeanne and achie outside after mass for a while. jeanne looked really pretty today, she was going to el hugeos roommates going away party.

Went to duke and dutches after mass, bought this billabong warm up jacket. Imma return its too small and i dont really need it either. My celli was trippin after i got out of mass, the time was reseted and it wasnt letting me fix it. So i stopped by the place where i usually do all my cell phone stuff at. The girl fixed the problem, by juss taking the battery out and putting it back in. Ha i shouldve thought of that myself, im dumb! haha Kuya made me this i guess id call it, the "kuya hip hop mix." with songs by justin timberlake, jay z, fab, and the clipse. Its pretty d0pe now i gotta something new to listen to in the car. He added his own touch to the Cd too by putting his pic on the cd. now i always remember who i got the CD from, thanks kuya! hahaha

Went to watch JLs musical w/beyonce and boss lady. The show was really good, it kept you awake and entertained. Though i kinda felt like they were insinuating a lot of things related to sex. Though, errone was really good and put on one great show. Jl had one of the main characters or leads in the play. There was this one girl who can sing really well. it was like hardcore singing, she could sing at a bar or something like that. haha Jl looked pretty tonite too w/her hurr all nice and wha not. Congrats JL on doing such an extrodinary job! you did really well!

After kuya met up w/us and we ate @ islands, cuz boss lady and i were oh so hungry! i couldnt even finsih my food though, it was so much. Island was fun, it was the food we needed to fill our little stomachs. Dang i realized im getting fat yo! i gotta start working out and eating smart or else imma clog my arties w/yucky stuff. i dont want tog et a heart attack or something like that. I wanna be healthy and stuff, so when im old im healthy too. its crazy how people can read you. Like they can totally tell something in you or see it in you, that you never knew they knew. That happened to me today during lunch, it was pretty crazy!

Well im gettnig sleepy, i hope this is sufficient enuff for you now kuya! haha oh btw errone hurr is the line up for this tues. It was suggested to me that i post it up on hurr.

Warm up~
lulaley
Im free
ive got a joy down in my heart

Contrition~
Come juss as you are
I want to praise you Lord

invocation~
come holy spirit we need you

Praise & worship~
the nails in your hands
i worship you almighty God
There is none like you
good to me

After prophecy~
God will make a way

Interecessory~lyn² will be leading my intercessory that nite
Servants puso

closing~
Let the fire fall

"Vacation all i ever wanted, vacation have to get a way..."im done, im out God bless!

"A good friend is someone we can count on, as well as being so much more. A friend is someone with whom we can relax and just hang out, have fun and share our innermost thoughts--deep dark secrets, lofty and noble goals, or our hopes, joys, and fears. A good friend allows you a safe space to share your deepest thoughts and needs--without worry of being judged, criticized or made to feel silly for feeling the way you do. Friends cheer each other on, laugh and cry together, and just plain commissrate and listen to each other. That's why friends are friends."

This was the quote i had used when i jacked up my whole blog thing. this quote is d0pe cuz it reminds of the type of friends i have now. How i use to think the friends i had in the past were like this, but they werent really.
I can do the most dumbest things in front of my friends and not worry whether they'll still accept me or not. Its great when you can have friends whom you can share anything with. Ones who wont judge you for feeling a certain way, ones who you can call @ like 3am and their ear is ready to listen. Friends who encourage you to strive to achieve and be the best you can be. Errone needs a little encouragement hurr and there, thas why there are friends. They help push you a long a little bit when you may feel stuck. I love friends, friends are great! especially when you can acknowledge your friends as pretty much your own brother and sister!

Today was tiring day, i think it was working w/all those kids @ work. LEts see wha happened today, hmmm. Well work called me @ 730am looking for a cable wire for the tv. I called them back telling them where it was, so after that since i was awake i went to mass @ 8am. After mass, went home and i went back to sleep and i ended up over sleeping missing class! ahhh Got ready for work and all that other stuff. hey i found my ring! i thought i lost it but i found it the other day. Though i dont know wha i did w/it now, i was wearing it last nite.

The new girl at work is really cool, shes so artistic and creative. i like it when you talk to people and they make an effort to keep the convo going. Thas wha she does, its not like simple one word answers she gives me. I showed her the ropes on how to do hall rentals and class registrations etc. We put the camp itenerary together also, which something i needed to get out of the way. Then @ 330 i had my chef's club class which i had like a grip of kids. there was at least 13, i think thas the highest ive had since i started my program. It was hard cuz we were in the kitchen making mac & cheese. i was get frustrated cuz they were fooling around a lot.

Got home and i took a really small nap, which only made me more tired in the end. Went to sre, achie took over jeannes class for tonite. Class was cool, we did this really cool prayer of St. Francis. Talked ot achie in the parking lot for a while. Then we prayed the rosary inside the chapel, she confirmed my prayer theme for tues.
I finished all my prayers for tues, i juss gotta do the line up. For some reason i cant pick the line up before hand, i have to do it after.

Anyway, talked to francis for a while on the phone. Hes in a spiritual drout so i tried to help him out. well this entry sucks fro tonite, sorry! haa i cant think of anything else to say. wooo im having lunch w/kuya tomorrow and im gonna chill w/boss lady tomorrow nite! wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo im so excited i juss cant hide it i know i know i know i cant think of the rest of the song. haha well warm bed hurr i come!
ahh i was so tempted once again to call....aghhh this is hard! =/ ::sigh::

"What if we were wrong about each other, What if you were really made for me, What if we were supposed to be together, Would that not mean anything..." im done, im out God bless!

"True friends are the people who are there for you unconditionally. They are the people who never question you and support you no matter what the circumstances are. They are the people worth living for."

The part where it says, "and support you no matter what the circumstance are." Well that reminds of the time where i had to make a difficult decision whether to go to the oh so fun youf alpha or stay w/the class i committed to last year. anyway, i guess that next morning after the nite i found out bout the decision, i waas tlaking to kuya online. He advised me(haah as he always does) on what he thinks would be best. The part that was d0pe was when he told whatever decision i make he'll still support me. That was coo juss knowing that whatever the circumstances were id be supported. He wont turn his back the other way. the quote brought back that small minor flashback.

Today was a very exhausting day, on the reals yo! i juss i wanted to sleep in, juss like i always want to do. Ahh juss one more day to get through. I woke up and i ended up over sleeping so i couldnt get to mass this morning. =( which sucked cuz i wasnt able to go yesterday either cuz of work. Tomorrow fo sho though, ill be @ mass @ 830am. =) I was stressing hard core on finishing the comp hw for cis. I tried to do it yesterday but i got stuck on it. I felt like i was going back and forth from skool and home today. It was stressful cuz i knew it was going to take a while and on top of that i had to do bof mine and kuyas. Wha helped though was kuya did the other half of the hw. So i guess thas teamwork right there! haha

Went to see the instructor this morning for help. he didnt understand wha was happening, so i went to the lab. The lab tech couldnt figure wha i did wrong either, he juss gave me new info to redo. I was able to climb ovet the small obstacle, and i went home cuz i figured the rest would be easy. Ended up i got stuck again, which led me to go back to the lab @ skool. Came back and i ended up finishing the rest of the hw there @ skool. That assignment took forever to do! agh first time i had to use the lab too for help. Usually i can either figure it out myself or at least kuya would know the answer. apparently not this time! haha

Went home got into a small tiff w/my sister. She can be so ahhh sometimes, difficult to deal with. haha she always throws the god card @ me. i juss laugh cuz i think its funny. went to work and i did this pretty creative art proj with the kids. We made puzzle pieces easter spring wreaths. YOu put puzzles pieces in a bowl, mix it w/glue and food coloring. Mix it altogether until its all mixed in well, then spread over the paper plate. You cut out the middle of paper plate and put around the frame. Its a bit messy though cuz you end up getting puzzle pieces all over. The new rec leader started todya, shes a coo kid. haha shes 19 a year younger than me. She spent the afternoon w/lyn² @ the park. i feel comfortable working w/her cuz id ask her questions and she create convo w/me. So thats coo its always nice when you can get a long w/the people you work wif.

Went to class this morning and it was aiight. We got out early, which is nice. i always get so sleepy by the time that class comes. Its like the perfect time to take a really nice long nap. Kuya finally beat my snake score today @ work. Which leaves me, if i want to till sat. to beat his. haha the game all of a sudden turned out to be soo competitive. He told me he was pissed when he learned i beat his high score. hahaha He made this paper puso, then gave it to me. Then took it back and ripped in half! hahahaha he broke my puso into pieces..enk! that was corny. haha im soo looking foward to spending the week @ his house! that's gonna be d0pe!!! woooooo

i was craving jack daniel chicken strips tonite, so jeanne went w/me to fridays. i almost got the jack daniel strips and buffalo wings on top of that. Good thing i didnt get bof otherwise i woudlnt of been able to finish it. After dinner was over my appetite was soothed! haha mmmm jeannes fun to chill with, she's cool! this fri. boss lady and i are going ot watch JL's musical. Then were gonna go eat after! wooo i get to keek it w/boss lady, thas d0pe!
boss lady is grrrrrreat! hahaha ahh one more day of work and skool then its weekend! woo. maybe i can have lunch w/kuya on fri. i learned a valuable lesson today and last wed. too. From now on i gotta do my cis hw ahead of time and not last min. When i rush it last min. i tend to get stressed out and frustrated.

I think on sat. imma go to carson w/stider. I havent been to my other community since their xmas party. Its been too long and besides that i love going there. I mean to go to prayer meeting again in the same week, thas cool. Besides, i miss praise & worship on tues. so i can have it there @ carson. Those kids over there are fun to be around, they make you feel welcome. So today we start war, we start the bombs over baghdad, juss like outkast said in their song. Well im off to bed tonite, stay safe, put your duck tape on and be ready to go! i cant stop listening to that song, breathe. its in my head right now...ahh she hasnt called back yet..oH hWhy?! maybe when i least expect it, she'll call. Either that or she didnt remember who i was...or she's been busy. oh well, ill wait and see wha in store.

I keep getting this message to trust in God. I kept getting that message all over on mon. and then today i got it again. Soo i decided that will be my theme for my praise & worship on tues. "Trust in Him, for He'll be taking care of errthang for us." i gotta start to work on my prayers and materials for tues. Im excited to lead, i like leading prayer meeting, its fun! i need to work on remembering the football teams real names. i feel bad cuz i dont really know their names.

"Diggin' the scene, diggin' on you, diggin' on me. Baby baby-ooo-baby, baby, It's on like that, it's on like that.
I gotta be in love or somethin' like that..." im done, im out God bless!

"People love others not for who they are, but for how they make us feel."

sorry for the no blog last nite, i had a whole entry ready to go. Then i was trying to edit the one from sunday, then i got jacked up. Which ended up jacking up the whole blog entry, therefore leaving me w/no chance to blog. I lost the email where i had my entry posted to and then when i tried to retype it, it didnt let me post anything. I kept getting a stupid error and i was already pissed off cuz i lost my entry. So i went to sleep blogless agh!! so that is why i had no entry, and the pics are the only things i had cuz mizike put them up sometime durng the day. Now you know why i had no blog entry last nite, sorry for the inconvience! haha

Well imma try taking some people's advice and type out my entry on hurr first. After im done hurr, copy and paste it to blog. I guess imma experiment w/this idea to see how it works out. I like this quote even though it wasnt the one which i used yesterday. It great cuz you know w/certain people before it was like you always gotta work on impressing them. Work on a whole image thing, doing certain things, being a certain way juss to be accepted. Now its totally different, with the friends whom i have now, i dont like them cuz of who they are. But cuz they make me feel a certain way when i am with them. I feel secure, comfortable, at ease, juss dotn gotta put up a front.

Monday, i was feeling a little down pretty much most of the day. it was my grandma's(dad's side) 2 year death anniversary. It was sad cuz during the months before she died, she was going through so much pain. Errday it was the same thing, it seemed like it wasnt getting any better. I felt bad cuz the time she was over hurr, i didnt spend a whole lot of time w/her. I was always out and about w/my friends. Then when she passed away, it was hard cuz thas the first time i had someone whom i was close to die. Like errone else was juss people that i never really knew. She was the best though, always so warm and kind! Though i know she's in a much better place, away from all the pain and the suffering. She looks and smiles down upon me from heaven! Ü

I felt better later on cuz kuya came over for a little bit. That song he wrote for the pcn its pretty d0pe! i like the whole instruments he used for it. Especially the piano in the beginning, kinda reminds me of the song all my life for some reason. Kuya saw my whole pic collage on my board! wooo then i got to pray the rosary w/boss lady on the phone and talk to her too. So that was d0pe! we talked bout our jobs how we find ourselves explaining what we do. Then people will say in response either, "oh" or come up w/their own assumptions of wha we do. haha

Today was pretty coo, very busy though and tiring not to mention! Went to work and pretty much worked all day. We had the cpr and first aid training this morning. I relearned things i forgot bout cpr when i was trained 2 years ago. haha good thing i got this training to help me remember. I learned adult, child and infant, so if youre unconscious i could do cpr on you. Or if youre choking i can do the i forgot whas it called. Where you push the food out to help clear their passage ways. The trainer was cool, he made the class funny and not boring. Besides that he told us he was a good catholic, which was d0pe!

Took a small lunch and then went back to work. I met the new girl who is starting tomorrow, she seems pretty nice. Hopefully she'll be cool to work and real easy going. I was bit frustrated this afternoon and almost lost my patience. See this couple came in from this square dancing organization to check out the hall. I had to a walk thru explaining errthang that they need to know bout using the hall that day. So i do the walk thru and the whole time shes doing nothing but commenting. I felt bad for her husband cuz he would try to tell her its going to be alright. Then shed snap back and agh it was juss irritating. On top of that, there was this kid wathcing the movie. He keeps coming out complaning bout errthang thas going on. Or saying hes hungry or what not, he was the same way last tues. too. I was juss all irritated cuz of that lady, she finally ended up calming down. though it took me a long time cuz she juss got on my nerves.

Went to class and well the kids didnt help much either. I had to get back into the groove of things cuz i was @ youf alpha last tues. its juss hard cuz they talk a lot and they dont pay attention or they always got comments to say. Though i gotta remember theyre still young and have a lot to learn. For most of them you could really see that they are in jr. high. Went upstairs to prayer meeting, it looked a bit bigger tonite then usual. Strider led second half and he volunteered me again to answer one of the sharing questions. haha Its coo i dont mind though cuz the question was really hard. He did the same thing to me last tues also! beyonce came back to prayer meeting which was tight! she told me last niet she was coming back which made my day! wooo

So last nite i thought i hadnt talk to bess in a long time so i decided to call her. I call and the number is no longer in service like she changed it. At first i was like noo oohHh whY!? then i thought of something, i thought i wonder if her # is on one of their newletters. I went and i went through all the ones i had and i found it! i found her new #, i realized those things would come in handY! ha after going through that whole thing i called her, but i got her vmail. I left her vmail last nite, hoping shed call back but she didnt. The song on there was d0pe! it was in my head off and on all day. I was able to find who the artist was tonite.

As i drove to mcdonalds listening to the song, it made me remincise during the summer when wed text message each other. Ha i remember one where she text me, "you have a wonderful day too! your texts make me smile!" i was like awww haha the memories, ah yes. i called her on the way home from work today juss to see wha song that was on her vmail. ha she didnt answer though again, aw boo. oh well, hopefully she'll call back though!

After prayer meeting, we all went to mcdonalds tonite. i like going to mcdonalds cuz its a lot closer to home and its inside too. We had like a small snake tournament, kuya almost beat my score, but we ended up tying. Though i do have to say, he did beat me but i guess he didnt save his score. Which means im still on top, watch he beats me tomorrow. haha then its going to take me months to beat his score again! agh too much competition, cant handle it! haha jk oOoOH im hyped cuz imma get to spend the nite @ his house again next month. Man thats going to be sooooo d0pe! its going to be like umm i guess kinda like almost living w/him. hahaha i caught him tonite! he tried to run away, but i was able to catch up this time and well i didnt get to take him down. Next time on safer grounds ill be able to, though i guess i shouldnt really chase him cuz of his asthma. Dont want kuya to overwork himself now! haha

"and i, im desperate for you and im lost without you..." im done, im out God bless!

"True friends are the ones who never leave your heart, even if they leave your life for awhile. Even after years apart, you pick up with them right where you left off, and even if they die, they're never dead in your heart."

thas coo i liek this quote cuz it pertains to my best friend and i. Well when i got the job in stanton one of my main concerns was the relationship i was going ot have w/heif. Cuz before there was 3 of us who use to be really close, when we all worked together. Then that girl left and well after she left she basically quit talking to us. it was like wed always have to take the intiative to call her or wha not. Besides that she was all kill joy anyway cuz of her bf. Like he was always kill joy too and so his attitude reflected on her, therefore it kidna would be like no fun. Anyway, i took the job and i guess juss told myself that if this was a true friendship wed keep in touch. Praise God, cuz it is a true friendship, and we always say to each other, how great it is that we can always juss pick up where we left off. There;s no awkwardness or dead silence where its like wha do i say next? its great cuz she's always there for me to talk to and help me out when i need it. She always juss i guess helps put me back on track when ive seemed to fall off. ha she basically knows errthang bout me and who i really am. its d0pe too cuz sometimes you juss want someone who'll juss sit and listen, thas what i call her for. sooooooo im very fortunate to have the relationship i have w/her. PLus wah also makes her d0pe, shes very friendly and make an effort to talk to people and stuff. Best friends are the greatest! wooo

so i didnt get to blog last nite, cuz i was too tired when i got home. This weekend was alright, nothing really goes on anymore, so its kinda like i got nothign to look foward too. Yetserday was straight chill and kick back pretty much. Slept in for a while and it was nice to finally be able to do that and listen to the rain drops fall at the same time. I redid some stuff in my room, took some ol pics out and put some new ones in. Scanned a couple others pics and printed them out too. I put together this new frame i got on fri for my desk @ work. Its looks pretty tight, despite the fact i had a hard time w/it. Then later on i went to chill w/achie, babyvee, strider, arch and aela. We went to go eat and watch a mobie. Well the girsl went to see chicago, i went go watch w/the guys hunted. whoa that movie is skurry! i actually got skurred cuz i had jumped and was like ah! a couple of times haha its intense and sad too. Its another one of those minds movies, where its kinda pschyological also. After i went to chill w/el huego for a small bit.

hmm oh yeah, hurrs some more if youd knew me things. If you really knew me, youd know that i always drink w/2 straws. That i cant have my arms or legs being all ashy, i gotta use lotion. All my emails i send out, i never sign my name on the bottom.

Today was a bit more exciting, at least i did something and didnt stay home all day. Went to mass, it was actually pretty packed this morning for being an early mass. man i wanna watch that movie seven right now, but my tnt is playing something totally different. Probably cuz we got satalite, i miss cable cuz errthang is different now w/satallite. so anyway, after mass i went to eat @ hometown buffet for brunch. Saw an ol friend from hs, which i havent seen in ages. It was coo cuz she recgonzied me and wasnt all stuck up and stuff. Sometimes people are like that which really bites! We chatted up a little bit kinda doing a brief catch up.

You know in hs, i always thought id keep in touch w/errone. I was so in denail when my aunt would tell me im not gonna talk to half the people i went to skool with after i graudate. Its true, its not often i talk to my ol hs friends. Ill see them errnow and then or hear gossip from others on whas going on. Though its d0pe when you do get to talk to an ol hs friend and share all the crazy stuff going on, in bof of your lives. hmm the past two people whom i last talk to from hs, they were bof doing well. They bof had bfs already and were still going to skool and working too. Its crazy how you juss look back at how very fast time can change. As that saying goes, nothing lasts forever and its true. ha i was looking back at the very last issue of our SLA newsletter and there was one portion where errone wrote their fondest memories. Well one person who decided to remain anonymous put, "The most memorable moment was when a bunch of us were playing mafia on the bus and diane kept accusing ja$on of beign the mafia and then he was totally psycho on her. it was so hilarious!" haha when i read that i was actually laughing out loud.

Went w/el huego to check out this one apt off of western and lincoln this afternoon. We didnt even look inside cuz the outside was juss straight out ghett0. Chilled @ his apt for a little while, and while chillin there i finally accomplised getting a high score in snake II. ha wooo i was excited, it sounds stupid cuz its only a game but well when youve been playing forever it becomes something. Then we went to the buena park mall to walk around and do something. We bof ended up buying something for ourselves too @ the mall. Strider met up w/us later on, along w/jeanne and we went to joes crab shack in anaheim. it was coo there, we got to see the employees dance there! haha stider and el huego were telling me i shouldve gone up and dance w/them too. haha rooight!
The only thing that sucked was we had no music outside! boooooo i shouldve asked them to redo it, since we couldnt hurr music from outside.

Then we went to target, they were all on a swe3t high i guess. So they got some candy snacks inside there. Took strider back to get his car, and then went w/jeanne to cerritos. We met up w/the people who hit the back of her car. Im assuming either the paretns ddint know she got into an accident or they juss dont care, but the girl came w/her brother. It sucks cuz the girl is only 16 and it was a brand new car! it was coo, cuz her brother was really cool about the whole thing. he told jeanne juss to get it fixed adn to give him the receipt and they'll pay for it. So after that we went to the walmart in cerritos cuz i was determined to find something there. Then they didnt have it, so off we went to kmart in la habra. jeannes so swe3t cuz she pretty much drove me errwhere tonite to help me get wha i needed to find. Ü

awwww on the way there, we passed by applebees and it brought back memories. ::sigh:: ha i dont think i could eat at that place again, its not the same. Then as we passed it, some 98 degrees slow jam was playing so it was like oh great! hahaha ::sigh:: two places i dont think i could eat cuz it wouldnt be the same. Applebees and cheesecake factory, but only the one in old town pasadena. Probably likely id ever go that far to eat there again. Mainly though juss applebees cuz thas where it alllllll started that one warm july summer evening. ::sigh:: the memories...ahh yess, the memories.

dang no one answers my questions of the day anymore. They answered the first two and then quit after that. Its kinda like a credit card, its already been declined so many times but you keep trying anyway. haha hurr is todays question, wha are 3 memorable moments for you in 2002. hit me up, i wanna know!

"Gummy bears, bouncin hurr and there and everywhere. High adventure that is beyond compare they are the gummy bears." im done, im out God bless!

"Life's most urgent question is: What are you doing for others?"

another one of those if you really know me, youd know that i hate when youre talking to people and they say "let me call you back" but w/the intentions of really saying, "ill juss talk to you later." Cuz then you expect that person to call you back and when they dont its agh. anyway, i forgot to add a couple things to the past two blogs entries. yesterday one of the kids in my programs were dancing right, and when i walked in she was doing the actions to the lula ley song. Though the song she was singing wasnt lula ley it was some different song. I wonder where she got it from. I think imma use that song for my line up in 2 weeks. haha

Then wha happened oh later on . oh well i had these little girls, then i also had a lot kids from the boys & girls club. So it was like a typical little kid thing, where one of the boys friends would tell the girl he likes her. The girl gets all giggly and juss like whatever. Then the boys finds out his friend told girl so he has to deny it. Then the boys friend comes back and tells the girl something else. Then the girls friend talks to her and i tells her to tell the boy she has a bf. When she knows she doesnt gotta bf she needed an excuse. i was laughing to myself as i saw the kids go back and forth. ::sigh:: ahh yes the good ol days of being a kid again! haha

Another thing that happened that i forgot to say, was on wed. So kuya and i were going back and forth saying how hijo is dumb and kuya is stupid. Jusss like we always do, so this one lady in class smiles as she hurrs us. She asks me if hes my brother, i said oh no. Then she looks kuya and i guess smiles and asks if were friends or something, then he respond back looking @ me, saying were cousins. i was laughing i told him whyd you tell her we were cousins for. haha

Well i was able to do something today, that way i wouldnt of been bored @ home. It gets boring when you have no one to talk to or chill with. Anyway, i went out and chilled w/babyvee today. We spent pretty much all afternoon together. I ate these delicious fish cakes @ their house w/this different kind of rice. It was all really good! i couldnt stop eating, it was one right after the other. Went to the towne center, hit up some stores over there. Like the forever busy wal-mart, man that wal-mart is always busy thas why i stay away from there. Its always jam packed, especially the check out lines. After that, went to check out some stuff @ old navy, though i didnt find anything i liked.

After that, we went to kohls the store that juss opened up there inside the towne center. Theres so much walking inside that store. Maybe its juss me being lazy or something. haha I bought a picture frame over there and i was able to use my $10 gift card. That was coo cuz that helped out a little bit. Im excited to put the pictures in there sometime tomorrow. Then ill be able to add another frame unto my desk! wooo! My desk @ work is full of different pics. One of these days i wanna make a big collage and put in a frame, then put it in my room. I wanna put my big white board inside my room again. Before when it was in there, it was like my tag board. Forreal like errone hit up and wrote something on there.

After the towne center, we went to the catholic book store, the angelus shop. I needed to buy my former supervisor a belated birfday gift. So i bought these small little prayer book called, "Gods prayers for women" or somethign to that extent. babyvee bought a small book on angels, it talks about all the angels and what not. Then we went to go drop it off @ the daycare. babyvee is thinking of maybe working there or at least trying it out, cuz she wants to work w/kids. Then i went to get a hair cut @ super styles. i decided this time im not going to bleach my hair, imma keep it black.

After the haircut, we rushed over to mass. Where i was trippin cuz there was this girl who i thought was boss lady. I kept staring over that side too, cuz babyvee and i were sitting in the middle. the girl was sitting on the side where agaisnt the chapel. I asked babyvee too if i thought it was her, she said she couldnt see. haha im blind. Then at one point i thought the girl had waved, but i turned away. Well i finally figured out it wasnt her, when she up for communion. i saw the girl come out too after mass and drive off in her little civic. She was kinda cute, though not as cute as the real boss lady! woooooo Ü

Oh yeah i was so tempted to buy this billabong warm up sweater/jacket @ duck and dutches. There was two, one was blue w/green and the other was brown. It was like $44 and i really wanted it to buy it. I almost acted on impulse and spent the $44 on it. THough i realized i dont need it, its not a necessity right now. While inside the store though, i saw some filipina lady from our church and her daughter. They said hi to me so i said hi back. So while i was browsing the lady asked me if i was shopping. I said eh juss looking around for stuff. Then she gave a typical filipino response, "oh wow you must have lots of $$ then." i laughed and i said not really, then kinda slowly walked in a different direction. Babyvee bought these two different shirts, one w/a flamming butterfly and the other w/a horse.

Went home for a little bit after taking babyvee home, then i went to stations of the cross. It was cool cuz i saw some of my students there. i was talking to one of my parents and her daughter who had surgery doesnt wanna get up. Juss feeling in one of those miserable stages. Where she is pitying herself and waht not. The mom told me how hard its been on the family ever since. The mom has been stressing a lot and juss worried bout her. So please keep them and their family in your prayers. After stations, ruth, babyvee, & jem prayed the rosary together inside the chapel. Then i went up to apologetics for a while to see what was going on. It was jam packed, like how prayer meeting use to be.

i went to Jesus christ church of the later day saints afterwards. Im thinking of converting to becoming a mormon, thas why i went there. haha jk no i was suppose to meet up some ol skool friends to watch them play ball. No one i knew was there at the time i was, so i turned around. i wanted to go juss to say, sup but i didnt feel like waiting. Those people have no sense of time at all, agh i hated that when we all use to chill. ALways late, never on time to errthang.

Went to reconcliation @ St. Peter Chanel then stayed for a while for adoration. i didnt know they had like 1000 spanish mass. So i came in during the concescration and since there was confession i went to that also. After i went to chill w/arch. Took him to get some albertacos and then went to this house to chill. good times, good times! Well thas a recap of my day, nothing too interesting or exciting happend. i wanna go to pachanga now, arch told me its 18 and over. i think ill go tomorrow by myself! haha seems like nothing else is going on this weekend, so ill go and entertain myself! haha hey no one answered yesterdays question of the day, boooo!
hurrs today's question, "Wha do you like best in your life...why?"

i am getting sleepy
i like kool aid
i hear the sink juss drip
i smell nothing right now
i taste the drops of kool aid from my drink
i hate it when people tell you, theyre gonna be at certain spot, at a certain time and they arent there!
i feel warm now

"What you won't do, do for love, you tried everything but you don't give up..."im done, im out God bless!




"

"There's something in a simple hug that always warms the heart. It welcomes us back home and makes it easier to part. A hug's a way to share the joy, and the sad times we go through, or just a way for friends to say they like you because you're you. Hugs are meant for anyone for whom we really care. From your Grandma to your neighbor, or a cuddly teddy bear. A hug is an amazing thing--it's just the perfect way to show the love we're feeling but can't find the words to say. It's funny how a little hug makes everyone feel good; in every place and language, it's always understood. And hugs don't need new equipment, special batteries or parts--just open up your arms and open up your heart."

whoa thas a long quote! hugs are d0pe! haha kuyas hug story tonite was funny. well i took me forever to find a freaking quote to put on blog. At the same time i was talking to errone and playing paper rock scissor w/gail while arguing what the wafers are pronounced, either nila like manila or nee-ya. anyway i was going to use this quote a while back the ni found a different one. hugs are d0pe cuz theyre special and juss like a smile it can warm someones heart in a instant. Theyre comforting, helpful, friendly and most of all priceless...

anyway, i was searching for the longest time for this letter from this girl i use to like. haha actually tonite i was going through a "remisince" stage in my life. Well i was looking for a quote and then i took out my journal to look for one. From there it led me to a whole lot of different interesting things. like i found this one of my old entries.

032602 "i was bored and started reading some of my past entries. Wow, how things easily change. I havent actually been going out lately. I dont want to sound dramatic, but my social life right now is empty or at least seems that way. Everyone has either their bf/gf or just dont call me anymore. I hardly do anything w/jen or erin cuz theyre too busy w/their bfs. The rest of them dont even call me anymore. its kind of sucks cuz b/c i feel so left out. Thas why ive been trying to do other things. Get out more and meet new friends.Its cool, last nite this guy from church asked me if i wanted to be part of their skit. Of course i said yes, mine as well. im going to the thing theyre doing it at anywya. Im glad ive been going to prayer group lately. It makes me feel better about myself and who i am. PLus ive made some nwe friends on the side. So thas life right now..."

thas crazy huh! thas like almost a year ago. now look im constantly out w/them now and i actually know know them. Ive been able to become close to errone and feel so comfortable w/errone. I remember i was trying to do that stupid events co. too on the side. THen it got too much for me and i knew i couldnt handle both so i quickly had to choose one or the other. whoa dejavu this sounds like ive talked bout this already in a previous entry.

Then i came across this one conversation this girl i met onlnie a long time ago sent me. This guy tried to spit game w/her online. He told her bout this old love life like how him and his ex had a distant relationship over the summer. he lived in La she lived in daygo, one nite they went to her house and they were listening to slow jams together. They ended up falling asleep together on the couch, blah blah. Then he suprises her w/roses at the beach during a bonfire. Well summer ends and they figured they had to break up cuz they both led busy lives. He did volleyball, she did drill team so i guess their social lives would end up clashing. The girl i guess really made a big impact in his life yaddah yaddah. interesting story huh

today was another interesting, yet sad day at work. One of our seniors had like a mini heart attack this morning and they had to call 911. So they put her in the hospital and i guess shes had like heart problems in the past and she never told anyone. I think shes ona breathing machine and doing all kinds of tests on her or something to that extent. Though part of her heart attack was pushing herself to do too much. Shes a very devoted senior @ the city. Juss very grouchy and mean most of the times. You gotta be careful not to get in her way and you gotta have patience w/her.

We finally hired a new rec leader, i didnt get the chance to meet her though im interested to see her. I guess she use to work for the program before under the previous dept head. On top of that it was one of those youf cafe thingys, were theyre paid to work and help do wahtever stuff is needed. Ryans sister didnt get it, cuz she told them she was only avaiable certain days czu shes was going to work both jobs, La Palma and stanton. Which is practically impossible, theres no way you work in both cities part time. At least not in a rec leader position that is.

Being that im the senior rec leader now, im trying to ease my way to get my own office! i was joking around bout it w/my boss earlier this afternoon and he was juss laughing. He left early today and he asked us to cover for him in case anyone asked where he was. So i todl him its going to cost you, then he said remember im @ the boys and girls club. So i said hmm i need a new office space too, and he juss laughed. I saw this position open in norwalk for a rec leader. Im interested in applying but im kinda skurred too @ the same time. The pay is really good, but i dont know. I gotta pray bout it and figure out waht im going to do.

SRE was alright, still a lot of kids out sick w/something. Man that bug is really going around right now. After that we all went to marie calendars to chill. That was pretty fun, had some pretty skurry convos bout gangs and our past lives. Man i remember this one time, OH it was the same nite after the first holy spirit sat. Anyway, my friend gary(leslie;s older bro) went to some party in la habra or something like that. Well on our way over there, we saw all these cards kinda bone out. A lot of them too were getting pulled over by the popos and stuff. So i had to turn around and go back the other way. Well we ended up going to albertacos off of valleyview and lincoln. We were all chillin then someone ran back saying someone has a gun and theyre gonna shoot. Gary and i boned out in my car afraid something might happen.

Or that one time my senior year when i was walking home and i almost got jumped for not giving up my pager. that was one skurry moment for me, praise God nothign happend to me though. I think those are my two most skurry incidents. I dont got crazy war stories to tell, which i guess is kinda coo. i was getting chills juss hearing bout the past ones tonite. This mornign i felt bad cuz after communion one of the eucharistic ministers was walking back up the steps. Well as she was walking she tripped over a step and fell down. I think right at the moment she fell i felt pain. it was sad, but shes alright though and was able to get up and walk.

I found this little poem a while back when i use to go w/my aunt to CSULB in their library to study. Anyway, there was this poem written on one of the desks of the skool. its called "dedicated to love"
I wish i was your pillow, so i could lie next to your beautiful face every second of the nite
i wish i was the ground, so i could catch you every time you fall.
I wish i was the air, so i could feel your soft and tender lips for everytime you take a breath.
I wish i was an Angel, so i could give my thanks to God for putting a window into heaven in your eyes.
i wish i was a dream, so i could find my way into your eyes.
I wish i was the earth, so i could stop time and turn it back to the first time i felt you in my arms
but most of all...
i wish i was a feeling, so youd know where that i would love you more in a single dy that anyone else could lvoe you think w/all ther power of their souls in a liftetime.

Ask yourself~
Whom do you admire the most? in what does that person inspire you. hit up the tagboard i need answers! thaks

"two people, together it was just a dreak until you came along, my heart was waiting juss for you..."im done, im out God bless!

"A brother is not always a friend, but a friend is always a brother."

i can certainly attest to that quote! where would i be w/o brothers who are my friends! i wouldnt know how to do a lot of things. i wouldnt strive to make myself better than i was before. I wouldnt know a lot of things like for example, i wouldnt know what the god card would be thas fo sure. i wouldnt of been able to see the real life anaologies in the movie lord of the rings. hmm what else, an important thing, i wouldnt of been able to know a lot bout the church and how to stand up for my faith. basically im happy cuz i got some really coo brothas in my life. Ones whom ive never expected to have in the beginning. Its great! theyre generous, helpful, loving, gots a sense of humor, understands things. i got something to look foward too on fri cuz i get to chill w/kuya! wooo another d0pe, d0pe, d0pe brotha! good times, good times!

Well i was printing out yesterdays entry at work this afternoon and man it was like 4 1/2 pages long! i think imma transfer folders, put in a 3" binder cuz its only going to get bigger. Its so cool i made a little blog book, im feelin it! thanks Boss lady for the great idea! Boss lady is d0pe sister, she told me on fri that when kuya and her buy their 2 bedroom apt in la palma imma have a name plate in my room that says "hijos room!" hahah tight huh! my boss lady is so creative and juss fun to chill with too! i found another pic of us, but i dont like the way i look. my nostrils are all up and stuff like that. haha i looooooooove boss lady, cuz shes swe3t like suga! hahahaha

Today was another interesting day, a bit frustrating, a bit worried, interesting but never the less all in all a good day. So lets see, well i mustve been really knocked out last nite cuz i dindt even hurr my phone ring. I wanted ot wake up @ 730am so i can go to mass @ 8am. i ended up waking up a little after 8am. i woke up agh now i gotta to mass later then planned. I went to mass @ St. i again, their daily mass is a bit different. They give out the whine too and besides that they got like 100 eucharist ministers too!

I can never go back to sleep after mass, i always end up going straight online talking to kuya. Thas pretty much how i start my day, going to see Jesus then talking to kuya. agh i dont like talking to you kuya online anymore! agh jk ha i cant start my day now w/o to mass and talking to kuya online, its like my day isnt complete if i dont do those two things. i forgot to add something to the if you knew me thing. If you knew me, youd know that i gotta make things even. Like if youre online ill tell you to wait a certain time so we can make it even. haha if you knew me, youd know that i always drink with 2 straws. if you knew me youd know that i can talk a lot hahaha if you knew me, youd know i have this certain type of laugh. if you knew me youd know that i love pictures! taking them and looking at them! if you knew me youd know i can be really lazy at times.

I attempted to try and get the comp hw done in the lab today. Actually my goal was to leave by at least 10am, that didnt happen. I left like 10 min before 12pm, then i had to go back and pick up my disk @ home. I got into the lab trying to rush to get it done. On top of that i didnt really understand the lesson so i had the hardest time doing it. then i pulled out my disk too soon and i lost the whole database file! i was like agh! so upset, but then i got over it. I figured ah one wont hurt that much, so i tried to not think about it.

Went to work, which was another interesting day there. I got like 10 kids this afternoon! wooo i had them do tear art, which is like simple to do. haha its coo i always come up w/my projects last min. basically all they had to do was tear pieces of construction paper and make something. Then i had them help me clean out that back extra office, which should be my office. Boss lady you saw how messy that thing was! it finally got to me today, so i had to clean up otherwise i wouldve lost my mind. So now its all nice and neat, you can actually walk through there. Then some kid from this professional theatre program pulls the fire alarm. All the doors in the building automatically shut and we all rushed outside. Errone is all rushing outside and the fire dept comes over w/sirens and all that. i took the kids to the park to stay away from the drama. haha but two interestin days in a row over there. first we had the sheriffs yesterday and now the fire dept.

went to class and i found out im sitting next to the mayor's wife of stanton. i was like whoa! thas so crazy! i wouldnt never expected that or thought that. PRaise God for humbleness though, cuz the lady is so nice. A lot of peopel would take it straight to their heads, but shes coo. Very nice to talk to and stuff. how crazy is that though! its like whoa! i cant wait to tell errone @ work tomorrow! i told the instructor tonite too bout the hw and he was cool with it. Praise God! so i can turn it in next week and not get 0 for it. thas a big relief! class was alrgiht, it was kinda funnny. Check it so kuyas playing snake ever so hard trying to beat his 926 point score. he ends up dying and he hits his head agaisnt the wall. Talk bout hardcore gamer! haha then we were running around his car after class was over in circles. i dont know why or for wha reason it was though .haha

Well its time for another of those, "ask yourself..." thanks boss lady for your generous response. no one else hit up the tagboard and answered the question i asked. booo you guys who didnt do that! I think for me id ahve too much id wanna bring out. i think it would have to be this ol rabbit i got when i was a little kid. I named it radar after big birds bear on seasme street. i dont know cuz i want to bring my journal so i can recall the memories but i also want the pictures. OKay hurr is todays question....hit me up your response on the tagboard, if you dont hit it up imma come after you! "What is your most treasured memory...so far this year?" hey some boy band remade that song all for love the origian from color be badd

"I want you to know that ill do it all for love..." im done, im out God bless!

"I don't remember how we happened to meet each other. I don't remember who got along with whom first. All I can remember is all of us together...always."

thanks to reirich for posting this pic for me!

Thas how its like now w/the friends whom i have now. Its like i dont exactly remember when i started to get close to errone. I dont remember who i got along with first, i juss know now its all of us together. Well i think it took a baby steps to be close w/errone. it juss like anything else it took a while to establish all the personal relationships. I know i felt comfortable talking to jaymee and mo rice cuz we would always talk after prayer meeting. Oh and JL too cuz she was my aide on thurs. nites for SRE. Then gradually i was able to feel comfortable and be open to errone. Which is something thats really d0pe cuz i dont have to be afraid of being insecure or hiding anything w/errone now. Its crazy how God puts people in your life for a reason and it all starts off w/one small step.

So check it, this is how i work this equation out in my head. The way i think or see where i am today, right now. If Father Fogarty never asked me to do youth alpha 2 years ago, then i wouldnt of meet the lopez's, i wouldnt of meet the soratorios and i wouldnt of known kuya. I wouldnt have these wonderful people in my life. Which also would mean then, i probably wouldnt be in servant;s heart. I wouldn't of been in core group, i wouldnt of been a real practicing catholic and not juss a half way one. Its pretty funny, but i know its not a coincidence. It was all part of God's plan, part of that blue print. i wouldve never imagined myself being so close to certain people, for them to have such an impact in my life.

Geez i feel old cuz ive been doing SRE for so long now. On sat. this one kid told me in el huego's group that i had subbed in his class before. Then i see this other girl who was in my aunts class making her first communion a while back. Now look shes up there bout to make her confirmation. I praise God that He has given me the strength year after year to come back. You know whas funny when i use to be real secular, i remember going to his one party. It was like at some old house and i was w/my friends. Upon going inside the house this one kid rememberd me subbing in his SRE class. What a great example i was for him, seeing an SRE teacher full of alcohol and smoking.

I dont feel as tired as i have the past few days. Maybe cuz i was able to get a full nites rest last nite. I went to sleep before 1230 and well thas early for me. Im tired but not so tired where my eyes are shutting as i type this blog. I printed out yesterday;s blog entry and i added it to the blog binder. If i ever own a company or something and people are waiting to see me. In the lobby imma put my blog binder out there as reading material. haha Theyre gonna want to book mark it and take it home. "Oh wait but im right hurr when ja$on was talking bout this..." haha thatd be hillarious i think.

i went to mass @ 830am, though i didnt go to pius, i went to St. Irenaues in cypress. Which brings up another good memory. It was a late sunday afternoon, i know there was the lopezs, soratorios, jay, fred and i dont know if kuya was there or not. Anyway, we were passing out flyers to their "life-teen" confirmation kids. We all had gone to mass over there too. After i was irritated w/this one girl who was being real sarcastic and smart... to me! Then someone calmed me down and told me all i could do is pray for the conversion of her soul. Then after that we ended up eating @ karutas for dinner. It was mmmmmm good! i havent had their sushi in a while.

After mass i wanted to go back to sleep but i couldnt. Well i didnt tyr but i knew i wasnt really tired. Instead i attempeted to do my comp hw. Ha! that was a joke cuz i didnt even get anywhere even. Thas why im going to the lab tomorrow morning to seek help. Then i gotta re-read the chapter and study for the quiz. Okay i keep yawning i think im starting to get in that sleepy stage.

Went to have lunch w/kuya and we ate at subway. Okay i juss drank two glasses of some blue kool-aid hopefully this will help me stay awake for a little bit. Subway was good, i had some teriyaki chicken sandwhich sub. Man i feel bad for kuya cuz he really messed up his leg. When he walks its like i could feel that pain. I kinda know what that feels like. Then i gave him bruises tonite on his arm when we were playing "showdown w/iraq" inside mcdonalds. i think this time iraq was able to seek their revenge on the US! =) I guess im all bone and no meat so it hurts!
blue83212: kuya has bruises now :-(
JPFish187: aww sorry!!
JPFish187: i didnt mean to hurt kuya
JPFish187: i got caught up in the moment
blue83212: hehe it's ok
blue83212: as lon gas it's hijo
blue83212: haha
Went to work and i think they were expecting me in @ 12pm. So when i got in my supervisor changed my schedule and put me back on 18 hrs a week. Which is good cuz i was down to only 12 hrs a week. Thas a huge difference cuz that would mean even smaller pay checks. I cant wait i get paid on thurs.! wooo i still havent recieved my state income tax refund back. I think its only like $40 or something like that. I decided once im done paying off a few things, im not going to use those accounts again. I know i say that now, watch i go out and buy somehitng tomrrow from there. haha Actually i ripped up my robisons may card today, that way i wont be tempted to use it.

So work was aiight, i had 2000 kids for the movie today. Probably cuz it was a new movie still thas why. I love lilo & stitch movie. haha kuya does a funny stitch impression, he use to do it a lot. haha I love the soundtrack to the movie you cant help but to only dance. Agh i had a group of kids from the boys & girls club mess around w/the pay phone. One of them took it too far and called 911, then hung up right after. Well i was in the front desk the whole entire time. i could hurr something ringing which did sound like a phone, but i didnt think anything of it. I totally forgot bout the pay phone actually. The phone keeps ringing and i shake it off think nothing of it. Next thing i know hurr comes the 3 sheriffs walking into the building. I see them talking ot the kids and i go over to figure waht happened. The sheriff told me wha happend and basically told me the kid whom he thought it was.

i called the kid and asked him waht happend. he straight out lied in my face saying he didnt do it. That he saw other kids around there and they probably did it cuz they ran off. Well i didnt say anythign else cuz i figured well i dont got proof so i cant blame him. On top of wha he told me, he said hes not lying cuz he woudlnt want to lie to a police officer.

Well i had to let the boys & girls club know since he is their responsibility. So i go in there and have a meeting w/him and the director. I come to find out that he was lying and it was him who did it. She gave him a huge lecture and the kid wanted to cry and stuff. Then tried to get out of using other kids as a scape goat. Well she made him go to the sheriffs dept and apologize then hes suppose to do something for me. i juss dont know what i could make him do. Id be skurred to apologize to the sheriffs, especially if they already figured it was me who did it. man oh man thats gotta be the most humiliting thing.

Went home ate, changed and i was off to prayer group. Im happy cuz i got all the stuff in my trunk taht ive been meanign to give to kuya out of there. errtime i see him i forget to give it to him. Now its all out of my trunk and its all clean again! I gave my talk tonite @ youf alpha, along w/el huego on "how to resist evil." Thank you for all your prayers cuz, i was so nervous. i guess it was juss anticipation waiting to give it and juss what they would think of it. my puso was beating really fast too, especially during the end of the praise & worship. Or maybe it was a combined mix of bof the hypeness of singing Praise & worship and being nervous also.

The talk went really smooth and real well. Like once i got up there, i couldnt help to juss keep on talking. i was worried though i might trip on the cord and fall or something. I just felt the Holy Spirit come through me and juss fill me up. I guess i was talking really loud too into the mic, but i wanted to get their attention , i needed to be loud so it sticks in their head. Though i couldnt of put the talk together w/o the help of jeanne, beyonce, jaymee and mo rice. I just barely put it together too yesterday in class and ended up adding things hurr and there. I hope they got something out of my talk and they were able to get hte message. i forgot to mention something, but oh well God wanted what was said, said.

el huegos talk went real well too. His flow was good for juss being he made it up today. He got them to feel relaxed and was able to get the message across through real life situations. Being there @ youf alpha made me miss doing it. yeah i had the opportunity to do it again, but God called me to be elsewhere. God has placed me where i am now w/these set of kids. Ive planted a seed in them and i need to help continue to watch the seed grow. i gotta keep them on check , helping to pull out all the bad weeds that dont belong.

Prayer meeting was small tonite, its been small for the longest time. I guess it must be those budget cuts or something. haha jk I miss the good ol days in summer when it would be jam packed and hot! Man those were the days thas when we would go to the towne center and chill after wards. We keep migrating to new and adventurous places. We go farther from home, then we come back to home. Like we were at starbucks for a while, then moved to the towne center, now were at mcdonalds.

Speaking of mcdonalds, that one time when errone went! oh man that was d0pe! that was a great time of fellowship. Tonite was coo, we all kinda took turns andwering these question from the book of questions. i got it today from my boss, i was borrowing it. It has some pretty interesting questions in there. ONe of them was if Would you be willing to murder an innocent person if it would end hunger in the world? kuya said he would sacrafice me to end world hunger. hahaha i thought that was funny. Hurrs a hard question, well for me it is anyway. "Your house, containing erthang you own, catches fire; after saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? I wanna know your thoughts, please give me a call @ haha jk its like a talk radio Forreal though hit up my tagboard and let me know wha you think!

Oh i need to finsih this too...so hurr i go...
If you really knew me you'd know that...i have to take 2 showers a day, one in the morning and one before i sleep.
I like reading different types of books, so i enjoy reading. when i go to mcdonalds or burger king i always get a 6 piece nugget meal @ mcdonalds, and 9 piece @ burger king. Oh when i go to mcdonalds i usually large it too. i always gotta be on time or try to be on time to anything i go to. i gotta be organized and clean i cant stand unorganization. i subscribe to vibe magazine! haha hmm i teach SRE 2 nites a week. i drive a 98 black civic, i call my best friend heif. i always ahve to eat rice w/chicken. i like to move my body around! wooo i always drink a carmel macahito @ starbucks. i usually call errone by the nicknames ive given them. I have an aol best friend. i love pictures and i love looking back to talk bout the past like good times. OH! i love to play snake on my phone even before it competitive w/kuya. i love eating out and sleeping in! ive been @ cypress college forever. i write what i do daily in my organizer. i hate math, i like to make people smile. i hate asapargus and mushrooms. i love to eat candy and swe3ts. Im not a big fan on gettinf desserts @ restaraunts. i enjoy trying to find meaning to certain things. i like learning new things on the computer . i like putting myself out there and meeting new people. i cant go to applebees . i looooove AOL! i like looking up song lyrics. i can swim! i like to dress nice and i got like 18 different pairs of shoes. i enjoy working w/kids! did i mention that i dont enjoy kuya haha jk no i like kuya! i have a pet peeve in my car, that i hate it when people try to or unlock the door when it does automatically after i turn off the igintion. i like slow jams and eating good fruit. i dont like having all that other junk inside my halo halo only the ice and the milk. i like ube pandesal sandwhich. i like mulan cuz if she was real oh man! haha i like girls w/short hair like shoulder length short or a little shorter. i like the name nokio i like to shop a lot i like wearing sweaters! i got a collection of different jackets. i like hoodies. i dont like to eat pork only when it comes to lechon skin. the crunchy kind though only. i gag really easy. i have to have my hair fixed before i go out anywhere. i hate it when my hair is too long. i like the asian r & b artists. i met devotion online! haha oh another pet peeve is the "your" and "youre" i try to correct people when they mix those two up.

"i just cant believe yo uwere my love, you were just a dream that i once knew, never thought i would be right for you. I just cant compare you with anything in this world, youre all i need to be with forever more..." im done, im out God bless!

"Friends are the most important part of your life. Treasure the tears, treasure the laughter, but most importantly, treasure the memories."

Well other then family, yes friends are important people in my life. i take advatnage of errtime i get to spend w/them. I keep track of all the laughs, the memories and more. Its really fun to look back and reminisce at all the memories shared. Thas what i was kinda doing tonite, as i was putting together my blog book. See boss lady suggested to me that i should print out all my blogs. She said if something were to ever happen to the site, there goes your blog. I never thought bout it like that either. I write errthang on hurr, except obviously my most intimate personal thoughts. haha Blog has allowed me to always remember the day, to look back and to enjoy it. Its also allowed me to share my thoughts and opinions bout things on hurr. I guess it helps to let people try to get to know and understand who i am.

I was soo tired this morning when i woke up, i felt laziness come over me. I almost didnt go to mass and skool this morning. Though i pushed myself and said i had to go. Mass was jam packed, literally almost err seat was taken up. Errone is trying to go to mass more often cuz of lent. Watch when easter is over, its all back to what it use to be. It was really good gospel that reminded me again to see Jesus in errperson. I dont want to be the one who ignored Jesus and wasnt there to help him out. That would suck for me, so i gotta show compassion to people. Especially the ones whom i struggle with a lot.

Went home got ready for skool, talked to kuya online for a while. It helps me start my day talking to him online. ITs like a daily routine, the first person who i talk to errday. Went to skool and i foudn parking right away again. finding parking @ skool right away is certainly a blessing! wooo i started to work on my talk in math class. Just kind of put some thoughts together. Then i had to go back home during my break to pick up this book @ home. Then phil i was falling asleep cuz i was feeling so sleepy. We were talking bout evil and stuff like that. you know i hate it when pedestrians walk and its not their right a way yet. Then as youre sitting there wanting to go, you cant cuz they walk in the middle of the street w/o their turn.

Went to work and i broke a 6' table! The one thas inside my mini classroom. I gotta get that out of there tomorrow, the leg broke on it. I felt really energized teaching the kids today, i had 10 too for the first day! Which i was suprised but glad to see. so i only hope they felt really excited bout class that theyll end up coming back. Also bringing more friends w/them, so my program can really expand. The class went well, i got a lot of participation and they were already answering questions I had to change my wallpaper @ work cuz i guess i was gettign too religous. Besides thas all city property, so i was told we gotta be respectful to others beliefs. Which is weird cuz its only lyn lyn and i who use the office. I think the picutre of the crucified Christ was too much for them.

I finished puttign together my talk at el capitan. Well i went there so they could listen to my talk and give me pointers. Which they did! im excited ot give it, yet nervous at the same tmie. Jeannes been a great help w/the whole talk. hmm i cant think of anything else to say. im so sleepy again im fallign asleep as i type this all out.

if you really knew me, you'd know that: i try to do blog errday! robby is my kuya, emeline is my boss lady. I dont like mushrooms at all. i love eating! my fav drinks are mr. pibb and dr. pepper. i have 1 sister and 4 dogs. blue and green starburts are my fav candy. my best friend is jenny. i hate skooL! i like to make things even. i like my hair color bleach w/black. ahh my eyes are shutting ill continue tomorrow...sorry

"Girl I'm so open and I'm hoping that you know just all the crazy things I'd do for love..."im done, im oUT God bless!

"There is nothing on this earth more to be prized than true friendship." ~Saint Thomas Aquinas

Yes St. Thomas was sure right when he said, i heard that! When you have a friend that goes all out for you, even when they dont go to, thas a true friendship. YOu will cherish that friendship forever and ever until the very end. The friendship makes a huge impact on who you become or are. Its so great that you dont ever want that person to leave your side. Its kinda like what piglet said to pooh, "Promise me you'll never forget me because if I thought you would I'd never leave." awww isnt that juss cool! haha i treasure errday spent w/good friends cuz its a wonderful gift God has blessed me with. Im not lucky, juss blessed to have such good people next to me. Ones who make me laugh so hard that i literally cant stop. The ones who can the smallest thing and warms my puso up. Ones who bring me joy in the rain and help turn into a sunshine day. They turn my life around, they pick me when i am down. (got that from kci and jojo haha) I think the best kind of friends, who can juss listen. They juss listen cuz they know exactly thas all you need at that one moment.

I like that picture of kuya and i! its great! good times, good times! that picture was taken umm juss last month @ tita linda's birfday bash. wooo kuyas so fun to be around, he's juss super cool! haha I remember back in july like the end of the month. Oh it was the time when we were going to the shroud and SOl's bonfire. man i miss bonfires and the beach. I wanna throw another one this spring! like maybe during spring break i can or during the summer! bonfires are d0pe! Juss chillin on the sand, making smmmmmmmmores, listening to waves crash. ::sigh::

I know i havent blog in the two days, my weekend was jam packed! so much excitement and fun. i was going to do it @ aelas last nite, but i couldnt concentrate. hmm where do i begin? its sucks the weekend is over and the fun has ended. Tomorrow starts another boring week of skool and work. ::sigh:: hopefully it'll go fast, though i have nothing to really look foward to this weekend. oOh kuyas off on fri. maybe we can do our at risk youf program. We havent done in quite a while and looks like im in need of some help before i burn down buildings or something like that. hahah

Friday kicked off my oh so wonderful weekend. I got to chill w/boss lady all afternoon and morning pretty much. I picked her up and then we went to the bank to deposit a check. The lady messed up my account and put in more then she was suppose to. Though i corrected her and told her it was a mistake. Then i was trippin cuz i had more $$ in my account then i shouldve. Even after she corrected the mistake, i juss thought ehh ill check it when i get home. So we went to lunch @ some chinese restraunt in westminster w/kuya. Which we there ate a grip. The food was yummy, yummy, yummy. i got to try tofu for the first time over there too. It tasted weird at first, but i had to get use to it. After that boss lady and i walked aroudn the mall, they had a sale @ pac sun so we bought a lil something something. Went home for a little bit, juss physically exhausted after a long afternoon. PLus eating so much too on top of that. Went to mass @ 515, then went home for a while again. Came back to church later on that evening for stations of the cross. Then went to stanton for skit practice. Where kuya messed up his foot and i was having unbearable off and on pains in my stomach. I bought the fabolous cd too that day. I onyl really bought cuz i wanted to hear the so into song again. boss lady and i had some excellent convos in the car too. i love being able to chill and talk w/boss lady! THat nite i spent the nite @ kuyas w/el huego. We watched the ring, which was incredibly one stupid movie. I dont know why errone hyped it all up. Its more less a critical thinking and analyzation movie. Then we didnt sleep till 3am that morning cuz we all kept talking and talking.

Saturday was holy spirit saturday the confirmation retreat. How i was filled w/exhaustation and nervousness. that sat. was so much fun it felt like our lss all over again. funny story that happened that morning. i went to go and get donuts across the street. After they give me the boxes of them, he opened it up and showed me. Then asked me if i was "korean." i said no, obviously cmon now wha was gonna say. haha it was funny cuz he then told me he hooked it up w/some cream filled and bars. the kids were very touched i hope. i went out all dancing and getting all crazy. I havent done that in a while so it felt really good! The skit went well too, the kids liked it. Hopefully they'll only be motivated to stand up for wha they believe in. Took a nap @ home which felt sooo good. Then went to my sister's choir show was coo. then went to kuyas home and got stuff ready for kuyas. we all went to arch house to chill, they were watching some filipino movies bout mago. It was one of those romatic yet corny filipino movies. Had some fun w/el huego while he took a mini-nap.hahah ti was so funny. When we got home i was watching the bible story of abraham in the old testament. It was neat and yet interesting to see the story. i didnt finish it though cuz i was getting sleepy.

Today, i woke up from kuyas cell phone ringing, the sound of his house phone ringing and the bird chirping. after that i was up and i couldnt go back to sleep. Kuya and i wrestled instead playing "showdown in iraq." i was iraq and kuya was the big superpower the US. El huego was the country that was neutral that didnt wanna get in on the war by choice. kuya wanted me to disarm but i didnt want to. So he made me disarm taking away my blanket and pillows. Iraq didnt take that though, i fought back tried to take dfown the US. Though it was only too strong this battle. So i went over to try to take over el huego. Only to get myself caught in a war between both countries. I ended up loosing, though next time imma gonna blow them up! hahaha
Went to mass and learned that sundays arent part of the 40 days of lent. That well not to say "go all out loose" on your sacrafices but you can give in. Juss not go all out and give in to errthang cuz then thats taking advantage. Went to eat @ joes crab shack w/el huego and mizike. IT was good i havent been to that place in a year. We all shared this dessert that was really swe3t yet good! it was a super sundae w/3 scoops of icecream, bananas, brownies, m& ms and more! oh man we didnt even get to finish it cuz it was so much.
Later on i went to best buy w/my dad and we got this hp scanner, copier and fax all in one. it seems pretty nice, its convient having the scanner. The printing should be photo quality, i juss hope the quality is nice. Like photo perfect! Then went to the soratorios to have beyonce help me put together my youf alpha talk on tues.

I gotta end this hurr cuz my eyes are so heavy that im falling asleep as im typing. Pray for fred cuz hes still sick and i hope he's getting over it. I havent seem him online all day today. i have a grip of things to do tomorrow, good thing its my free evening to do whatever. haha funny thing, as i was leaving the soratorios tonite, tita linda told me as i was walking out that she was praying for my gf to come. haha something like that i was like aww haha.

"Cherish the thought of always having you here by my side. Cherish the joy you keep bringing it into my life.
Cherish your strength you got the power to make me feel good..." im done, im out God bless!

"To me, there are three things we should all do every day. Number 1 is laugh. You should laugh every day. Number 2 is think. You should spend some time in thought. Number 3 is you should have your emotions moved to tears, could be happiness or joy. But think about it. If you laugh, you think and you cry, that's a full day, that's a heck of a day."

i like what this says! Its a good lesson to think bout errday. It sucks often times we are too preoccupied over things we stress out. We end up stressing out and that we get frustrated and angry. So when tough times arrive think of a happy thought. SOmething that will touch your lil puso and make you laugh. If you cant do that then call someone who can help make you laugh. We all need a little bit of laughter in our days. Hmm i laughed this morning when kuya and i played mayor online. We played city council and took turns being the mayor. I thought that was funny! or a convo i had w/gail tonite when she was helping find quotes. Spend time to pray or juss think and refelct back on your day. What happened that made the day what it was? Go back into detail bout what you did it helps to realize what a blessing that day was. Even if there was trials and struggles, hey you made to end of the day. Then be moved so incredibly something that you either laugh so hard or cry or do something. Thas my 2 cents for today. it took me forever to find a quote i could write bout.

I went to mass this morning, though i was really tired as i knew i was gonig to be. THough once i was up, i felt good. Mass was good, it made me remember how last spring instead of going to class, i ended up going to mass. I miss going ot daily mass, or how i would go during my lunch break. Then after that did my daily morning routine, talked to kuya online then showered and i was off to skool.

i went to class and when i got my quiz, my brain went blank and i failed it! woo! haha oh well he drops the lowest test score anyway. Went home for a little bit then went to work. Work was pretty kick back, i finished cleaning that empty office. Which is now gonna be used as the tutor room. Actually my boss told me i should get that office cuz now im a "senior rec leader." hah wooo! so ryans sister turned in her application last week and its more then likely she's gonna get the job. Thatd be d0pe if i get to have that as my own office! i guess the city manager asked bout me the other day. Then he said cuz im the oldest rec leader there. As ive been there the longest, it makes me a "senior rec leader." wooo that felt good cuz it came from the city manager.

Praise God cuz this week wasnt as stressful as i expected it to be. I remember telling boss lady on sun, how im not looking fwd to the week. I juss want to get it all over with and stuff. I dropped off the flyers and the different skool districts. That one in garden grove was all far, i was afraid i was going to get lost coming back. So i get there and i go to the mail room to drop off the fliers. Then they tell me i have to get them approved which they already were. So i sit and wait for the public information guy to approve them, when theyve already been approved by him. What a waste of time, cuz when he saw them he was like oh juss drop them off in hurr. I thought man that was a waste of my time. Those mail people in there are dumb. Its not like i was hiding a bomb inside the flyers or anything.

On the back i stop by the blessed sacarment @ st. polycarp. ahh going there brings back memories, err afternoon id go there on my way back from the park. There was that one time where this ol homeless man approached me while i was praying my chaplet. He needed $$ to buy his perscription @ walgreens across the street. Then he gave me this long all speel bout his medical condition and how he was suppose to win $$ but his lawyer past away or something. I juss gave him the $$ anyway, though after i wondered to myself if i did the right thing or not. ahh yes the days of summer! ::sigh:: thas when prayer meeting was full of a variety of people. We didnt have a football team yet. hahaha now we do and i think its only growing bigger.

After work, went to sre and discussed the significance of ash wednesday. Why we celebrate lent, and what lent is really all about. i had a lot of kids absent tonite, that flu virus is really getting around. IM praying that errone who is sick only gets healed. I hope the virus doesnt hit me, oh man i cant afford to be sick right now. no way!
went to starbucks w/jeanne after and she helped give me ideas for my talk. Im excited to start to put it together now! woo! jeanne is d0pe to chill w/cuz her and i can relate to a lot of different things. Thas why i enjoy talking to her cuz we understand each other. It was another good time to add to the collection. How weird we felt the same way bout so many different things!

haha i had asked gail to find me some good quotes to use on my entry for tonite. hurrs her response
JPFish187: doy ou know any good quotes
JPFish187: where i can write a lot bout
JPFish187: haha
JPFish187: to make blog longer
DaYsL33pR: haha hmmmmm
DaYsL33pR: hehe u mean like ESSAY topic?
DaYsL33pR: fer sho
DaYsL33pR: lol
JPFish187: hhaa
JPFish187: no for blog
JPFish187: haha
DaYsL33pR: hahaha same thing
JPFish187: okay!
JPFish187: hahah
DaYsL33pR: hmm random quotes off the toppa my head:
DaYsL33pR: saints are the sinners that get back up (i thik thats how the song goes)
DaYsL33pR: one right to rule them all
DaYsL33pR: hehehehe
DaYsL33pR: *ring
DaYsL33pR: hmmm
JPFish187: haha hey thas like
DaYsL33pR: come see the softer side of sears
JPFish187: lord of the rings!
DaYsL33pR: it IS!!
DaYsL33pR: u wanted quotes???
JPFish187: hahahahaa
JPFish187: thas funny
JPFish187: hahahahaa
DaYsL33pR: gotta be the hair
DaYsL33pR: the other white meat
DaYsL33pR: fosters: australian for beer
JPFish187: hahaha
JPFish187: wait whas the ring
JPFish187: to rule them for saints?
JPFish187: haha
DaYsL33pR: lol wat????
JPFish187: ohh wait nm
JPFish187: haha i thought the
DaYsL33pR: hahaha!
JPFish187: quote was connected
JPFish187: hahaha
DaYsL33pR: they're separate quotes hahaha
JPFish187: i thought it said
JPFish187: "saints are sinners that get back up with one ring to rule them all"
JPFish187: hahahahahahahahahahah
DaYsL33pR: LOL!!!
DaYsL33pR: hahahahaahha
DaYsL33pR: use that one
JPFish187: hahahahahhahaahaha
DaYsL33pR: lol hahaha
JPFish187: imma put this convo on my blog
JPFish187: hahahah
DaYsL33pR: lol
JPFish187: thas funny
DaYsL33pR: hahahaah yea
then i was talking to reirich and out of nowhere this comes up...which i didnt get at first what it meant.
rangeles122: awwww, look, it's 1"43 AM
JPFish187: whas that mean
rangeles122: 1:43 AM how cute
JPFish187: ooh gosh
JPFish187: hahah
[Name] Ja$on
[Nicknames] jfish, jay, heif, ja$e, fish, fishy, fishhead, hijo, angel fish, jmoney, jcrazy, sheesh and the beat goes on and the beat goes on. haha remember that song?
[Location] bPc
[Age] 20 but when i turn 21, oh its ova man! imma drink till i cant drink no moe haha jk

Five Basic Facts
[x] I am a guy
[x] I have a bear named kuya bear
[x] I am in the the debut fan club haha jk
[x] I wanna go to thugz mansion
[x] I went to the starbucks on beach!

Most Listened To Bands/Artists: i like emo! haha sike! i like dru hill asahnti, fabulous,all that and more!
Special Talents: i can bend my elbows back and make my arm look broken hahaha
Your Friends
[x] Do your friends 'know' know you? some not all...
[x] What do they tend to be like? greaT! Christ-centered helpful, wonderful, super duper cool! d0pe chill, good, nice, happy, haha
[x] Last friend you talked to? Online: gail & reirich, well techincally gail cuz reirich signed off w/o saying anything haha In person: Jeanne

Randomness
[x] Last illegal thing you did: underage drinking? haha
[x] Can you play an instrument: naw
[x] Do you detest religion: rooooight
[x] How do you think this universe was formed: oDg
[x] If you currently follow a religion, do you think people who belong to another religion are ignorant: well sometimes...
[x] What do you prefer, a sunny or rainy day: i think ill go for a walk now the summer suns calling my name...
[x] Choose one word to describe how you feel most often: I have three? Happy, excited, loved.

More Randomness
[x] Do you consider yourself lucky: Lucky? Blessed fer sho.
[x] Do you wear plugs in your ears: no
[x] Do you own one or more objects with studs or spikes in them: no
[x] Do you own Converse shoes: i got brown ones!

Habits/Beliefs
[x] Are you disgruntled (having a general hate for everything): Literally the complete opposite.
[x] Are you an anarchist: no
[x] Does the American flag anger you: No, this is gay
[x] Are you "working class": yes i am
[x] Do you dislike "preps": i thought this word said "perps" atfirst haha
[x] Do you dislike Hot Topic: No.
[x] Do you smoke cigarettes: Nope
[x] Do you smoke cloves: yeah! hahah thas tight! haha wooo! jk
[x] Are you a thin waif: No i'm a fat hobbit
[x] Are you vegan/vegetarian: BLOODY MEAT IS GOOD
[x] Do you think meat is murder: oh gosh
[x] Do your nighttime activites usually involve drunken underage vomiting: No, though i wishthey did hah jk
[x] Have you ever slept in an alley or park: yeah!
[x] Do you wash your hair less than once a week: ewww sick
[x] Have you ever gone a week without a shower: ewww thas so sick
[x] Have you ever been avoided due to your odor: now thas straight out gross
[x] Do you know who Jack Kerouac is: no
[x] Do you like Mr. Kerouac: roooight
[x] Should Mumia Abu-jamal be freed from prison: yes lets free him
[x] Are you a member of the Makeout Club: yeah! lets make like a banana and split moreless! haha
[x] Do you say "rad": naw i say d0pe

What Impresses You?
[x] Looks cuz cmon you gotta be physically attracted cuz that might be the person youll wake up next to forever!
[x] Niceness
[x] Friendliness
[x] Talent, in whatever
[x] Humor
[x] Taste in music of course
[x] Knowledge
[x] Goodness...as in morals, and church-stuff
[x] UNDERSTANDING
[x] Conversational skills
[x] Confidence
[x] Humility
[x] Kindness, basically the basic virtues
[x] Openmindedness

What DOESN'T Impress You
[x] Cockiness!! or Pride!!
[x] When you try to talk to them and they act all weird about it!
[x] Judgemental people
[x] Girl who care way too much about their body
[x] Girls who flirt or think they can get anyone they want
[x] Girls who are close minded
[x] Narrowmindedness
[x] Girls who whine or cause drama!
[x] Girls who are idiots with guys and are immature

"You're my sunshine after the rain,You're the cure against my fear and my pain.Cause I'm losing my mind, When you're not around It's all, it's all, It's all because of you..." im done, im ouT God bless!

"A hero doesn't have to save a busload of kids from certain disaster. Or score the winning point in the big game. A hero can be anyone who inspires you, anyone you look up to, anyone who cheers you on, makes you better than you were before--just as they made themselves better than they were before."

And then a hero comes a long w/the strength to carry on...haha figured id sing that since it only seems to fit with the quote. Woo i got many heros in my life whom i truly look up. The ones i get exicted when i see them. These people inspire me, work with me and is juss always there to make me feel better. I dont know if i would be who i am now without them. They smile at me, reassuring me errthang is good. They know whas the best for me and only want to see me succeed.

so today starts my daily morning mass journey. Its gonna be a struggle cuz i know imma be extremely tired in the morning. its all good cuz itsa sacrafice imma give up sleeping in. use my time and talents to please God, cuz thas part of whas lents all about. i forgot to add a couple other memories to last nites entry. I remember i had rode w/strider to cerritos towne center after fcfc. it was awkward cuz i dindt really know strider very well at all. Ha we were listening to the laker game on the radio, while hes telling me bout fcfc. Pretty much what the differences are between catholicism and protestantism. I found the conversation very interesting, though i have to admit it went over my head. haha cuz i didnt know really anything like that bout my faith. Then on the way to the thai boat after sol youf rally, he rode w/me. i opened the sunroof and he stood up as we were bumpin the chronic.

Oh i remember after ncfc i think it was, anyway it was the velascos, lopezs minus jaymee, jay, erik from sol and i. We all ate at the rubios at cerritos towne center. Well being it was dead the workers there were oh so cool. They let me sing on the mic! hahaha jay sang too, though we only failed to realize that the mic reached outside too. So when we came out it was kinda embarassing cuz people were looking at us. it was all good cuz it was fun!

Today i thought of something to do for lent. i was thinking of going to class and not ditching anymore. thats gonna be the hardest thing to do out of all them. That means i cant be lazy anymore and stay home instead of oging to class. haha i think i can do it, itll be a challenge for myself. Kuya kinda knows my skool schedule which is skurry. Like yesterday he said to me, "agh hijo didnt go to class today." haha when all actuality i dont have an afternoon tues. or thurs. class. So please pray for me that i wont be lazy and will actually start to go to class errday.

As i was entering the parking lot where i usually park, i was praying for a spot. Thas wha i always do anywya right when i enter the lot. Then right before my eyes there was a spot, an upclose good one too! so i took the spot, praise God. class was aiight, we have a stupid quiz tomorrow. I gotta finish the hw too tomorrow morning after mass. Since i got to skool early i was walking around to see if i would see jeanne. It was funny cuz she told me before that when she walks, she walks w/her head down. haha So when i saw her, she was right!

Went to mass @ 1215 and i was expecting to be like a regular daily mass. Man it was packed like it was a regular sun. 1215 mass. I didnt expect it to be so busy, i thought people would be @ work or something. So yeah went to mass, then went to eat w/mizike and lyn lyn @ mcdonalds. Came home got ready for work then left to work. Work was aiight, i finished the stupid binding for all the skools, so im sure imma end up delivering those tomorrow afternoon. Then i kinda sat around took advantage of my boss' being a meeting so i went online. i havent done that in a while so it felt nice. Besides ive been so busy anyway i deserve a little free time.

Speaking of work, im kinda dissapointed. See i offered this job to ryan's sister and she told me she was probably gonna bring back her app. Well to this day she still hasnt, and she has till tomorrow to turn it in. I mean who wouldnt wanna leave a place to a better environment altogether. I dont know i guess it doesnt phase some people. If she doesnt take the position it kinda makes me look bad cuz it shows that the person i got isnt dependable. She probably doesnt wanna switch cuz shes so comfortable where shes at now. This reminds me of the first part of the book im reading. The who moved the cheese book that my oh so d0pe kuya bought for me.

Imma finish it on fri or maybe tomorrow nite. I havent had the chance to read it since last nite. THoguh from waht i read its good. i know it wont take long either cuz the text print is so huge and the book is only like 74 pages altogether. I like reading books cuz it helps boost up your vocab! haha My cis class tonite felt like it was dragging on and on. actually i was falling asleep in there, i kept having to try and wake myself up. I looked to my left and the seat was empty. =( kuya wasnt there in class to talk to, which made the nite even longer. THough we ended up getting out @ 820pm. The computer went out and he couldnt get it to show on the projector, so he let us out early. hey kuya btw i forgot to turn in your hw, sorry i left on my desk @ home. ill make it up to you w/lunch or something. hahahaha jk! =) dont worry i turned it in for you. i know you probably looking at the screen and well i could already see the expression on your face. hahahaha

Went ot starbucks and had a nice conversations w/achie and atche. Atche told me her guardian angel joke tonite. i thought it was funny, i was laughing hard. Hurr it goes, she told me she was in her car and she was praying. Not like deep meditation or anything but juss praising God for the day and what not. She told me she felt like her guardian angel was w/her. Like he was there next to her praying w/her. She said his presence felt so real, that she wanted to use the carpool lane! hahahaha

well this entry is stale for tonite, i cant think of anything else to say right now. I want to buy the new fabulous CD, anyone wanna get it for me? haha they remade that song "so into you" w/ashanti, the hook is d0pe! you gotta hear that jam cuz its banging!

"Can we just feel this way together till the end of all time, can I just spend my life with you..."im done, im out God bless!

"Memory is a way of holding onto the things you love, the things you are, the things you never want to lose."

ahh so hurr i am bout to reattempt to do this entry i jacked up on last nite. Ah you dont know how pissed i was after that! man a whole good entry down the drain, i could be using a different quote tonite. BUt nooooo stupid AOL had to shut down on me. I was gonna try to do it @ work, well thas a whole different story. ive been kinda stressed these past couple weeks @ work. Especially cuz its only me in the afternoons.

Memories! what a great thing to think bout, they make us laugh, sad, happy, joyful, angry. Actually they make us full of different emos. These past couple weeks, ive been really reflecting on different memories. Mostly all the happy ones cuz this past year basically all the memories have been happy. Tonite was another memory to file inside the filing cabinet. See its like inside our head we have a personal filing cabinet, inside that cabinet are files. Each file is labled on the tab for specific memory, like tonite would be labeled "fellowship @ mcd 030403") Then whenever i wanted to, i could pull that file up again and reflect on those happy moments. Its great how those memories are never lost. I mean no one could ever jack them away from us, cuz they'll always be with us. No matter if were far or away, the memories will never go away. So i guess with that being said, let me reflect upon some of my memorable moments in life!

Right around this time is when i first came back to the community. I remember that one tues. after prayer meeting aela how come i leave so early. She was going to tell me to chill w/them @ starbucks cuz thas where they go after prayer meeting. I got excited, i was like aww man j wanna go next time. That was back when i was still joining the community. The coffee shop @ fcfc was d0pe, well when i first met up w/errone i was only really talking to kyle and nicole. We were talking bout my cousin cuz they both knew him and stuff. That was the nite kuya juss bought his brand new car. He was so excited too cuz he was tellnig me how he didnt have a good car before hand. I got to ride in that car too w/boss lady that nite. We played 20 ?'s in the car haha they were trying to get to know me. When i saw them perform i was like wow theyre good! then mizike met us there and he wore his uPrM hoody and i wanted one right then and there! i thought to myself, that sweater is d0pe!

Its crazy, i remember when kuya was only like 21 and him and boss lady came into my class. At that time i was teaching a eucharist III class. My kids were preparing to make their 1st communion that spring. Kuya and boss lady taught my kids all these praise & worship songs and cheers. It was really cool, and the kids were all into it and stuff. OH! then i remember that sat. was the youth alpha retreat. Then i gave the two of them the thank you cards the kids made for them. kuya was excited cuz they spelled his name right. its weird i remember the smallest details sometimes. he was sitting on the stool looking through them and i think he was like "look hunni! they spelled my name right toO!" hahah i wonder if they still have those thank you cards. Man that was forever long ago! its crazy, now im close to them.

That sun. mizike imed me out of nowhere too. It was hvnboundrockr has sent you an instant message, woud you like to accept? I was like hmm okay i wonder who this is, then he said, "hey wassup ja$on, this is mike from servant's heart. THanks for the signing the guest book!" i was all happy haha cuz i made a new buddy to put on my buddy list. hahaha It was kinda weird cuz i didnt know really what to talk to him bout. So i juss asked questions bout how he did the website and stuff. Next time he imed me, asking if i wanted ot be a priest in their skit. then i was like whoa! haha i was excited so i said okay! haha Oh easter vigil mass i bought an uPRm hoody off of him cuz i thought it was d0pe!

ha youth rally was tight, i was really feelin it too! That day i went there, it was kuya and fred talking outside of el capitan. They were talking bout cellis, cuz they had att & t and el huego comes along showing them how to take out the "at & t" thing off the screen. I felt kinda weird cuz i didnt really any of them at the time. So i twiddled my thumbs and waited for errone else. haha Then i remember sitting on the couch @ el capitan and i met anne and justine that day too. The skits and the talks and wah not were good. oh i didnt understand why people were crying @ the end of the nite. During the exposition, let alone i dindt even understand what that was. I thought to myself why is errone crying? hahaha how funny. i had thai food bbq for the first time that nite, it was greasy!

OoH the SOl bonfire, when i met alma from SOL! haha our group put together our hmm a little presentation to advertise our lss. Alma told me that my dance was coo or something like that. The memorable fellowship sh movie nites and what not. I think thas how i kinda got to errone through the fellowships. i felt stupid cuz i think we were gonna watch scorpion king. Anyway i didnt know they were meeting @ el capitan, i thought it was @ archs. So i get lost trying to find archs house, and then mizike calls me and asks where im at. Then lets me know theyre meeting @ el captian.

The day after the youf rally i was all tired from the long day. Anyway jeanne invited me the day before that to her birfday celebration. errone met up @ the lbtc to eat @ lucilles. i only had fries that day and mr. pibb cuz i ate lunch before hand. i was frustrated too before hand cuz i wanted to put the group pic. of the youf rally into her frame i got her. Well the stupid printer wasnt working, so i couldnt do it. aww booo the printer head broke or something. ooH WhY!? haha i rememeber the skit practices too, we did one @ aelas, we also did one @ my work @ the daycare. Agh i had to work @ 6am the next morning too! Ooh that was during the time, someone ran into the door. So in the other room, the district made this huge barrier, the kids werent suppose to go into the other room.

ahh who could forget lss! i know i cant fo sho! haha all the hard work we all put into advertising it. I was able to get a grip of my friends to go too! it was so much fun, then the sat. after lss, we all came to mi casa to chill. Then there was an emergency, but praise God errthang came out fine. I was so tired that sun @ the end of lss i went home and i tried to take a nap. Then arch calls me telling me we were all going to eat after. Though in the mean time to meet @ the soratorios cuz errone was unloading lss stuff in their garage. Good thing the guy called me and godo thing i went otherwise...well im sure you guys coudl figure it out on your own! haha ::sigh::
The different SH movie nites from spider man and star wars II that was cool. We would always watch it @ fullerton amc and el hugeo would plan it. He would buy the tickets ahead of time and then we juss had to wait in the forever long line to get inside.

oH!!!!! another of those good times, good times! when boss layd asked us to critique her essay or presentation for skool. Like it was about why she chose to be a recreation major and stuff. Oh i remember cuz the nite before, we all went to watch spys "youf nite." They did this skit thing and there was only us to watch them. haha it was kinda sad yet funny cuz i mean they did in the church and it was empty except for the front two pews of the church. Then after we went to stater bros to help pick out stuff for tacos. We bougth taco supplies to make our own tacos. I came later on that nite after SRe all excited haha and i brought dessert too!

Trying cow tounge for the first time and not even knowing it was cow tounge! haha tita coras birfday party it was a suprise. i felt kinda awkward cuz i didnt know that well yet still. I remember i was the first one there and like i was sitting there by myself, then jeanne and Jl comes. i was like whew now i have someone to talk to. i That nite, arch and mizike had to leave early cuz they were going to some concert. ha there was that one time, where they had Music ministry practice. Well jovie and i went to go pick up babyvee so i call and sh as like no i cant go cuz i got hw to do still. Then later on she went to archs w/errone else. Then erone told i was pissed haha but i really wasnt.

oh man all our buddy chats, when like we would stay up till 3am. haha thas when the velascos went to NY and babyvee would be online w/us till like 3 am! that was pretty much like a year ago! shessh! ha i remember that one time i went to study @ starbucks for my phil quiz w/a couple of my friends. I ended up seeing el huego there and he was getting something for him and jeanne. Ooh hmm i was impressed when i found uprm could play like secular songs @ tita emmys birfday party. i was liek wow thas so d0pe! haha that one sat. when arch, mizike, jovie and were chillin after a party @ mikes. We were talking bout the different tourist things in bp. So arch was asking if ive gone to medeievel times or wildbills and so all of them i had said yes. Where has he said no. Then he was like "maan you really kick it in your city." hahaha i thought that was funny!

Who could forget vI! ahh i cant thas for sure i think it was my first time being away from home w/o being w/fam bam. oh man i remember that fri. i had to work and i was extremely tied after a long day. When i got to kuyas i ended up knocking out on his couch till it was time to go. It was fun cuz we all prayed in a huge circle before we left. it reminded me of that one beverly hills 90210 episode i think it was their senior year. When they all went to the mtns. to make their class year on the hill. haha the trip over there, i was under the impression we were going to salt lake city, utah. So errtime i saw road signs i would count down the number of miles left till we got there. The couple of friends i made on the way over there! haha the peace offering i had to share! The buffet @ mandalay...wooooooooooo that was soooooooooooooooooooooooo good! yum yum chocolate chip honey diP! haha when kuya would tell me to dance in the middle of the casino, id end up doing it.

elijiahs birfday party was pretty fun! it was at the park in cypress and the games boss lady came up with was cool. The newspaper one was hard, the ducky wucky or something like that was funny. i think thas when kuya hit his head on the cement after playing ball. We were all worried for him too cuz he actually hit on the cement, which was hard! ouch...good thing hes okay otherwise id have no kuya. ooH that unexpected hmm "cry for help." that was hard cuz well i didnt know exaclty what to do. Though i did tell el huego and strider they helped me. haha i remember i did a findapix ad to last year, i wonder if i deleted it. haha i guess ill find out soon.

Ha i remember when i first joined the community, i was trying to do the events co too @ the same time. So err mon. i was going to their meetings and stuff and i remember telling myself it was weird. Cuz id be w/two different groups of people. The exact opposite groups, i realized it was too much to do so i had to choose one or the other. Well its pretty obvious which one i chose. haha im reading in my organizer bout this girl named ruby. i think i met her online i forgot bout her, it juss says "talked to ruby online. Wants me to sing to her." haha hmm i wonder wha eva happened to her.agh that one thurs. when i was irriatated cuz someone didnt wanna be where i wanted to be. The person didnt wanna juss chill so i had to take the person home i think and come back.

OOH man when justine hurt his knee! i had to go into mizikes car and justine was in the back. he was restng his knee on my legs. I had to use the bathroom like no other and we wer running around all over the place! i lost my nike towel too that day. i dont know what ever happen to it, cuz i think they were using it for him. hmm man and that towel was expensive too. Then we all went to burger king to chill afterwards. That same day i told babyvee id go w/her to her prom. awwww! that nite was d0pe! i remember going there for a whole week straight getting prom things organized. Then my tux felt small and too tight on me, agh it felt uncomfortable. I remember the place looked like you were going to the academy awards or something. Then we went to the beach afterwards @ newport, that was cool! her friend got lost trying to find the beach. We took a group picture that didnt really come out cuz it was too dark.

hmm wow we had buddy chats like err nite for 4 nites straight in a row! back in may, wow i wonder what we talked about. haha im reading this one part from may 28 in my organizer, "mike asks me if i like jennevee" cuz i was going to prom w/her. haha that was funny, i was like oh naw i juss want to go w/her so she can have a good time. ahh boss ladys grad. dinner i remember that nite. Babyvee revealed something quite interesting to me. oh the cotton cnady swe3t and roll let me see that tootise roll nite was cool! jaymee brought her cotton candy machine from work and we all made cotton candy @ my house! then we all went to eat fridays for some more fun! back in the days i always having buddy chats errnite w/the group.

ooH the suprise birfday party for kuya! haha i remember @ prayer buddys birfday dinner. Which i had the hardest time getting there and was having car trouble on top of that. Then i remember seeing two girls mack out which was whoa! and sick at the same time. So we were all eating at the crab pot in long beach and kuya was suspicious there was something going on. He was asking mizike and jay like "you know you guys are my boys right." then he said something else, then he said, "You know if there was something going on you would tell me right?" haha and they were like "umm yah of course." haha i cant remember who i rode home with that nite. i think it was kuya, we were in kuyas car cuz i remember the car being cold and we were listening to laker game. hahaha yeah i think it was kuyas i was sitting in the back and i think boss layd was in the front. but my legs were cold!

striders birday party was d0pe! haha i ended up getting dizzy that nite and my stomach was hurting. We watched the SOL video that day too over @ his house. The food was good and we also celebrated all the other june birfdays like mo rices. Then we all went to starbucks to talk bout the exciting upcoming VI trip that was coming up that week! ha we picked up babyvee @ her work in the lbc @ juice it up too! oh that was the nite the girls wanted to listen to JL sing on my vmail.

ahh the eve before VI trip we had music ministry practice @ mizikes. ti was quiet and interesting nite too, i got to see the uprm house they had planned on buying for the future. JL calls me and i had to take jovie home cuz it was getting late too. Ha i remember playing playstation in mizikes room, i forgot the bball game we were playing though. Ooh then my backyard boogie oogie oogie! i was happy cuz i got to see bof groups of friends and i got to chill w/bof groups too. ahh i remember the summer nites @ kuyas swimming and chillin. the one spit game through those pool toys. hahaha that was cool! hahah

OoH! playing mafia @ ninnis birfday! hahaha that was fun we played like forever long too! i kept getting killed right away though. aww boo i remember we were playing those other games @ sizzler and @ ninnis birfday. Those mind concentration games! like black magic! oohH it took me forever to finally understand the game. hmm the picnic game and other ones. haha i remember playing mafia @ sizzler and outside of sizzler! we weer crazy back in the days! mmm the one experiment we tried one nite @ mizikes, it was tasty!

the summer days @ the park, talking to jaymee like almost errday on the phone. haha when i was on the news on Cnn. i taped it too! hahah the whole samantha runion thing, how it became such a huge thing. it was crazy cuz it happened n the city i juss started to work at too. I remember people were iming me, hey i saw you on the news! haha it was cooL! that one nite i was up forever the nite before lss talking to godwin online trying to get him to go to lss. that was the only time we talked too online after that haha we quit talking. how i was happy cuz i got to pray the rosary w/a special friend. Ü

Making friends over @ carson, by going to their prayer meetings. Their lss was cool, very hot and crowded though. It made me miss my own community. making me feel "community sick" and how during praise & worship i was expecthing to do the "i worship you/there is none like you mix." how i was expecting the high note too in i worship you, like the way we do it. THen i was excited when i got to archs cuz i got to see errone again! oh the end of the summer jamboreezy fo sheezy bonfeezy i planned. that was cool SOL came and oxnard came to chill. Though i was called to work last min. after i was told i got the day off. i never went into work @ all that day. Talk bout your celli getting blown up! ryan, michael and i got to the beach way tooooo early. In the end errthang turned out cool though.

pentecost picnic was great! like the korean sh signs mizike made! haha then someone got offended and took them down. The games were fun, like the capture the flag! haha that was soo much fun! when tita cora jumped over archie! or the game when we took errthang we had off to see who could make the longest line. that was fun! good times good times! oh the conferences i cant forget those! ncfc and scrc whoa! when i saw the holy spirit @ scrc while praying! ran into a former co worker over there too. One of the best weekends i had @ scrc!

well i think my entry was long enough, i pretty much reminisced on errthang except all the recent stuff. wow so many different memories. Hopefully this brought back some memories to yall as well. enjoy! im tired, ahh im happy though cuz phil class is cancelled! wooo kuya lets have lunch!

"I really like what you've done to me. I can't really explain it, I'm so into you..."im done, im out God bless!

"Memory is a way of holding onto the things you love, the things you are, the things you never want to lose."

stupid AOL! thanks for messing up my whole entry!! aghhhhhhhhh i hate agh!!!!! now i have to redo my whole entry later on! aghi shouldve saved earlier man i hate this stupid thing. it only pisses me off all the time!!! freaking aye!

"Anyone can give up, it's the easiest thing in the world to do. But to hold it together when everyone else would understand if you fell apart, that's true strength."

well i had to do a kinda last min. change on my quote for the day. I had some long quote bout how hugs can make the difference but i realized ill use that some other time. So i was on the website i use for my quotes and i found a variety of differents ones i liked. I picked them out and emailed it to myself, from there i asked my friend tina to pick one she would use. Funny, how she chose this one cuz i was really leaning towards using this one as well as another one for today. Anyway, as i saw this quote it was the very last one on the page. It caught my eye cuz there are a couple of people whom i truly admire cuz of their strength.

To me this quote kinda speaks for itself. A situation could occur where you juss could say "screw it, " and let errthang go. Mainly give up cuz thas what we want to do a lot of times. We are afraid to try to persevere even through the most difficult moments. Why? cuz its the easiest way out of things. The quickest way to avoid confrontation and to forget bout the whole situation from happening. A person with true integrety and strength is the person who can stand up straight despite the most unexplainable negative situation. They have the ability to keep the smile, to keep the laugh going, most of all to keep their head on straight in the midst of trial. A lot of times, since we give up or since one person gives up errone else expects that one person to do so also. That one person who says no and continues to be that same person he/she was before, is a person w/true courage, values and in my book a very honorable one. i give that person props, cuz YOU prove errone else wrong. YOU prove that despite the struggle i am going to stand up straight and lift my head up high. To those people, whom im sure they know who they are, i commend you. I congratulate you, but most of all i look up to YOU!

With that being said, it was quite a day for me actually another interesting day. Man as i told boss lady im so not looking forward to the week at all. Too bad we cant skip mon.-wed. and then jump to thursday. For once i think im not looking foward to work either, but thats another story ill get into later. I was actually thinking of changing my blog and abandon ship and try a whole new blog server. Then i decided, #1 too much of a hassle, and #2 i have too much history on blog. its like that cheers theme song, i think boss lady was the one who sang it to me online recently, "where everybody knows your name..." haha

I went to mass @ 915am and this is mean, but as i saw spy came up for the childrens liturgy, i wonder if they actually enjoy doing what they do. Or is it mores less for all them to come up to chill. it was kinda sad cuz on thurs. one of the girl on the bus on the way back talked bout how they wished they could have fr. tony as one of our priests. Then the kid responded back, "yeah but then wed be in church for two hours. you wanna stay in church for two hours?" i was disgusted as i heard that, and especially dissapointed cuz it came from a big spv staff members son. Though, the attitude is understandable cuz look at their age. They dont know any better probably, i guess i have to understand i was like that too at one point.

The readings were really good and Fr. brennan(who is now my spiritual director)had a really convicting homily. in fact its kinda cool how he writes them down cuz then if he serves at another mass its that same one. Then you can talk bout it w/another person bout it, juss how boss lady and i did today. So fr. told us the homily was gonna be based on love story within a love story. He gives us the history of hosea and who she was, what she went through etc, etc. Then he talks bout someone else and gives us some background on them. Towards the end of the homily he talked bout faithfulness. How that one person(i cant remember his name, though i do know it starts w/a "G" i think...)was unfaithful to hosea. How another person was unfaithful to the israelites. But how no matter what, Christ is ALWAYS faithful to us. When i heard that i was like juss amazed and was like wow how true that is. Its somethign to really think bout, boss lady and i were talking bout inside kohls. Juss how were always on unfaithful to Him, by sinning even the simple venial ones we still are unfaithful to Him.

The second reading, i got out of it pretty much what the bulletin said it was. How we are God's letter of recommendation. He sends 'us' out, so that errone will read His letter, to hear His message to us. We are the living examples of this letter. Though He has not written on our hearts with an ink but with the Spirit of the living God. He has written on our hearts, and this letter He has written constantly gives us life. It is His gift to us, to show to errone. its kinda like to me, when you receieve that special letter from an old friend. You tell errone and show errone that you heard from an old friend and that person said this in letter. Well its kinda the same thing w/God. Except, its not on paper but on our hearts, and we as being catholic-christians have the duty to show errone what God's letter says to all. We cant take credit for what is being said in the letter cuz its not from us, but from God himself.

After mass we had a little shin-dig hurr at my house for my dad's birfday. it was coo, my mom made cheeseburgers and my sister made this d0pe snickers cake. Hmm i wonder fi there are any pieces left of it. Man im getting hungry thinking bout food. I should go look if there is any food in the fridge. Well right after mass actually i had gone to carl's jr to finally the gift certificate. i was glad this carl's had one, otherwise i dont know what i wouldve done.

Had core group meeting, it went very well took a while cuz people came in late. We ended up planning our whole year out into a little more detail. Our community has many great, wonderful events coming up in the next few months. The Eucharistic seminar is something to really look foward too, especially cuz we have two great speakers. Tito Jess and Father Angel, both really, really d0pe speakers who know their stuff. The nature walk should be fun too! a good way to get away from all the nonsense of the world and truly juss reflect on God's creations. The green trees, the blue sky, the beautiful birds singing in the sky, all this and more!

I went w/boss lady today to run a few errands. it was fun, i love when i get to chill w/her. She told me earlier she had this fri. off, hopefully her and i can get to do a "at risk program." haha I havent had one of those in a little while. We went to chilli's to get a gift card and the one she got matched the little gift card holder too. it was kinda funny how we picked out. There wasnt much of a selection to really choose from. Then we went to the brand new store across from the bp mall, "Kohls." Its like a mervyns and tj max, thas how i would compare it to. I didnt like it when i came in though cuz boss lady and i were bombarded to fill out a credit card app. They were pushing us to, right when we walked in the door. I should take that online survey huh boss lady and tell thats not cool. BOss lady fell in love w/the frames they had there. There was quite a creative selection to choose from. We saw these chinese characters that said different things like, "love, wisdom" and so on. She bought one for herself which said "love" and one for kuya that said "happiness." So we get to the cashier and boss lady finishes paying for the stuff, the cashier gives us this paper that has a website to take a survey. The cashier explains to us how to get there and what not. Then boss lady and i sit there expecting more, like if we take this survey well get 10% off or something like that. We were bof laughing after cuz we thought she was gonig say well receieve something if we take the survey. I guess we were bof wrong bout that one! haha oh well it was juss d0pe chillin w/boss lady.

Went to the starbucks and then went to the velascos to meet up w/my old friend there. it was great seeing him again cuz we had such a blast last nite. I didnt get to do the song i wanted to sing, its okay there will be other times. I had an unexpected thing happen to me, but im cool now. It juss this time the devil knew exactly where to hit me especially since i was kinda pondering bout it off and on throughout the weekend. I felt bad cuz i had to leave in the middle of all the fun, but i couldnt shake off the feeling. It only ended up getting worse for a while too. As i was showering, i was soaking in the warm water, yet at the same time the devil was taking more punches at me. To the point where i almost completely fell down. Though to the devil's dismay, after the shower i picked myself up again and proved him wrong.

Gosh, it kinda sucks cuz im trying to talk to an old friend of mine whom i use to chill with. yet hes not even really talking to me, and his response has only been one word. Even w/my other friend the other day it was kinda the same. like as if they werent interested in talking to me and what not. Oh well i dont care, they arent true friends anyway. They didnt really make an impact on my life, as others do now. agh i hate banner ads that pop up where youre trying to find something. They only make things more complicated! Its hard to talk to people who only see things through one perspective.

i was watching tv, watching that movie "salem witch trials." As i was watching i was gettinf sleepy cuz i was laying down on top of that. My eyes were getting heavy and i kept pushing myself to stay awake. ha i ended up falling alseep i guess then kuya called me. Whew good thing he called otherwise i wouldve knocked out.
We had a interesting phone convo. tonite, i was able to understand some things. Talking to him made me feel better too for some reason. Though i had a hard time explaining to him what was going on w/me earlier. He's such a great bro to have. Very fortunate to have him in my life, cuz he always helps me out whenever im in need. Man, if i had to i could write a whole essay on how d0pe of a bro kuya is. forreal! itd be like this, "My Kuya, by ja$on p. fish" hahahaha

Wow i have the greatest prayer buddy! im glad its someone whom i can easily talk to bout anything thas going on. Shes always brigthens up my day w/her oh so cute smile and juss is another great sister to have. pb gives me advice and explains to me things that i may never thought bout. Always there praying for me, as i am w/her too. We have karaoke battles, rosary nites and more!

Im blessed to have true people by my side. Ones who i feel comfortable talking bout almost anything to.
I decided for lent this year, imma gain and improve on something. Because i dont get to go to daily mass, except maybe on fri. cuz im off. Im going to go to mass err morning @ 8am, make that the first thing i do. I know its gonna be a struggle and difficult, but i know ill make it.

i think this is a long entry for tonite, i remember when i first started blogging, errthang would be crammed together. imagine if it was still like that? hahah oh man i dont think anyone would wanna read my blog. theyd get dizzy trying to figure out what im trying to say. good thing i do it in paragraphs now, though sometimes they tend to become really long.

"Sometimes you want to go, where everybody knows your name, and they're always glad you came. You wanna be where you can see, our troubles are all the same. You wanna be where everybody knows your name." im done, im out God bless!

"Sometimes in life, you find a special friend. Someone who changes your life just by being a part of it. Someone who makes you laugh until you can't stop. Someone who makes you believe that there really is good in the world. Someone who convinces you that there really is an unlocked door just waiting for you to open it. This is forever friendship. When you're down and the world seems dark and empty, your forever friend lifts you up in spirit and makes that dark and empty world suddenly seem bright and full. Your forever friend gets you through the hard times, the sad times and the confused times. If you turn and walk away, your forever friend follows. If you lose your way, your forever friend guides you and cheers you on. Your forever friend holds your hand and tells you that everything is going to be okay. And if you find such a friend, you feel happy and complete because you need not worry. You have a forever friend, and forever has no end."

whoa that quote is a paragraph all by itself! I was telling boss lady last nite, how my life is very happy cuz i have made special relationships with people. Juss how within the past couple months my friendships w/people have grown to be stronger. Meaning, ive really gotten the chance to become a lot closer w/these people. I dont need to go into details as of who they are, im sure they know already. Obviously cuz i talk bout these people in my blog daily. Im sure there isnt an entry where their name isnt mentioned. Its not juss one or two people either, its like 10,000 actually. haha jk no its a group of particular people. Thas why despite other stuff that goes in my life, its still content no matter what. Like for example, cuz boss lady is such a great sister, she enlightened me w/something important. She gave me a different perspective on some stuff which helped me understand. Kuya let me know on wed. during class he has an "open door" policy, which was comforting to know. haha Strider helped cheer me up when i may have felt down. Prayer buddy juss always lets me know errthang will be alright. Archizzle fo shizzle was big help this past week. Theres more people, but itd take forever to put down.

Today was another kick back day, i didnt do a lot. I cleaned the house and added some finishing touches to my room. I cleaned out this drawer i had full of juss misc. stuff. Now it looks neater and clearer. Wow ash wed. is next wed. i dont know what to give up. It was funny this afternoon, my mom threw the God card @ my dad. MY mom told us she was gonna give up rice for lent. Juss like any other filipino, rice is like a neccesity to have w/anything you eat. So my dad was like dont give up something you know youre gonna break in two days. haha Then my mom told him thanks for supporting me, sarcastically. Then she was like if Jesus came down today and asked me to give up rice to come to his kingdom, what am i going to say no, Jesus i cant. hahah i juss thought that was funny.

I redid my whole entire cork board in my room. I was bored and i was getting tired of looking at the same thing errday. So i took out all the pics and what other stuff was on there and redid it. The whole entire board is filled w/pics. Majority of them are all recent, if you ever come over ill show yoU! Since i lay down facing that board, when i wake up, ill always wake up w/a smile. I also put all the wallet pics ive accumlated from over the years in my mini albums. Speaking of pics, i saw this frame i almost bought @ ross last nite. It was nice, i forgot what it looked like though. I didnt buy it cuz it was kinda scratched on the top. I dont think i even have room on my desk for any other frames.

I went to mizikes well to chill since there wasnt really a music ministry practice. I dont get this, i went to two carl's jr looking to buy a gift certiciate. Bof of the carl's jr i went too, ran out or dont got anymore. I was like what the heck is going on hurr. After the second one, i was bit frustrated cuz i felt they probably had some they juss didnt wanna give it to me. Thas how i felt cuz when i first asked, the cashier was like i dont think a manager is around to get one. So then i said, "well isnt there anyone who can get one so i can buy." She comes back after checking saying they didnt have anymore. Gosh it must be a hot item right now on the market. haha

Talk bout budget cuts, my goodness service has been forever slow today. I went to carl's jr and it took forever to get my order of food. I was getting impatient cuz this guy at the very front was trying to push to use his coupons he had. At first i think they told him no, then the cashier went to go check. Then they were talking more and the line back of this guy was long too. They couldnt even open up another cashier to make the line shorter. Then at golidlocks later on, the service was slow there too. haha i didnt realize budget cuts do really affect errone!
So as you read since there was no music ministry, mizike, fred and i went to chill @ goldilocks.

After we went to the velascos to chill there, i ate some more there. it was d0pe cuz i got to sing on magic mic using the new songs! woo there are soo many great, groovy, new songs on there. Prayer buddy and i were having a karaoke magic mic ultimate singing battle. It was a competitive, tough competition, with it ending back at a tie in the end. Well prayer buddy sings really well too, which it made even more competitive. I sang "reflection" giving me a score of 98, which prayer buddy had to top. She ended up tieing w/me, i forgot to which song. Then she tore it up w/"dancing queen." i tried to come back w/songs like, "i will survive," "all or nothing, "american pie," "swear it all over again," and other such songs. That wasnt working, i almost said ahh im going home. Then i kept getting called back to magic mic, by magic mic. It kept telling me one more time, one more time. I finally caught up w"sukiyaki." whew that made us tie again. i didnt get to go home til almost 1 cuz i needed to even it up before i left. Which i was able to do! wooo! Cant wait to battle her agaiin!

hurr some funny convos. from the past couple days! haha enjoy!

JPFish187: mm tuyo sounds good right now
rangeles122: whats mm?
JPFish187: mmmm
rangeles122: tuyo?
JPFish187: yeah
rangeles122: that's sick
JPFish187: you dont like that?
JPFish187: oh man i love that
rangeles122: actually i forgot what it is
JPFish187: hahaha

UPRM Fred: hey start a rumor for me
UPRM Fred: bout me
UPRM Fred: see if it gets around
JPFish187: haha
UPRM Fred: say u have a feelin i'll be sent to Irag in the next 2 months
UPRM Fred: Iraq


Emmy3776: hey... i didn't know Mr. Rogers passed away
Emmy3776: when was that?
Emmy3776: yes sir!
JPFish187: oh yeah yesterday
Emmy3776: really? oh that's why i heard his voice on the radio, maybe as a remembrance
JPFish187: stomach cancer
Emmy3776: oh wow
JPFish187: yeah probably
Emmy3776: how sad, must been painful
JPFish187: yeah i bet
Emmy3776: wanna see a picture?
JPFish187: of mr rogers?
Emmy3776: no
Emmy3776: of today
JPFish187: oohh
JPFish187: haha yeah

"Baby I really know by now, since we met that day you showed me the way. I felt it then you gave me love I can't describe, how much I feel for you..." im done, im out God bless! wow how similiar to wha i felt 7 months ago! crazzzy!

"You always make each day a special day. You know how? By just you being yourself." -Mister Rogers

aww thanks for the inspirational quote there mister rogers. Its sad that he passed away, he was still young too. As i look at this newspaper heading it says, "A heart with room for all." Thas what i would like to be, being able to love errone and anyone. I remember watching that show when i was youngfer, juss as errone else and their lolo did too. haha forreal though, id would him do these arts and craft projects, then his neighborhood trolley. Then all the make believe stuff he had going on w/the puppets. Or the different guests who go through the imaginary world like the mail person and other cool people. Imma have to remember that thing bout being making each day special. I never thought juss being yourself could make the day special. i guess ive always relied on the people around me to help make my day special. After thinking bout it, yeah its true w/me being myself i was able to make my own day special.

As i was signing on to blog, i was reading their messages they post. Its crazy now they have audio blog! well you gotta pay for it, i signed up for it. Typing errthang out becomes tiring day after day, so from now on all i gotta do is call in and say,"dear blog, this is what happened in life today." So you continue to make your entry over the phone while driving, then all of a sudden some guy cuts you off. Next thing you hear "anyway joey and i were talking...hey! what the #$%&! you doing buddy! huh! you think its cool to cut me off..."hahaha thatd be funny. that would make blogging much more interesting. I was only joking bout the i signed up for it. Heck no its $3 a month to use that. I juss mine as well tell someone verbally bout my day. It kinda reminds me of the jetsons, that old space cartoon. The audio blog would be like "di-di" the diary judy had. haha how it would follow her around and judy would always say like, "oh di-di!!" really dramatically. Then the diary was shaped as lips w/those wavy lines going inbetween her lips. haha thatd be kinda crazy though if someone did do audio blog.

I forgot to add a few things to last nites blog, i was havnig a hardtime focusing on thoughts cuz i was engaged in a heavy convo. I thought beyonce was youf day, so i was endlessly looking around for her. I got excited cuz i thought i saw her a few times, but it ended up being someone else. Another thing that bothered me bout the whole trip well so caridnal mahoney talks bout vocations. basically answering the call if it hits you, how they need more young people in the religious life etc etc. So then he said they had little gifts for kids were actually thinking bout entering the religous life. You were to only raise your hand if you felt it was your calling. The gifts werent anything huge either. Juss a glow in the dark necklace thing that all the kids wanted. Then a prayer card i think to go along with it. All these kids hands shot up and some from spy too. I honestly knew at least spy only wanted the bracelet thing. I heard them too talk bout it, so im not tryin to sound cynical or anything. It juss i know how young kids minds work today.

Oh it was funny as i was walking down to get communion(which was very unorganized) yesterday that song, "you are near" was playing. The choir was singing that hymn for communion. So as i was walking down the stairs this lady next to me who passes hurss me i guess singing. She then says, "you have a nice voice." i was like whoa! haha i smiled and i said "oh thanks." Then like during the end of the day for the big end of the day rally. I hurr these two girls singing, "in da club" by 50 cent. i was laughing to myself thinking oh man, out of all the places to sing that. hahaha it made me think of strider too cuz i know he loves that song.

The block was coo for aela and antonios birfday bash. We hit up the alcatraz brewing co. for dinner. That was the 4th restaraunt i had eaten at inside the block. I tried the left @ albuquerque, which is pretty good. Hit up the market broiler, they got some good pasta there! The tu tu tango, had excellent calamri and now the alcatraz. The calamari wasnt as good as tu tu tango. I had some buffalo wings they were cool. i was able to use my final exposure left on my camera there. That pretty much sums up the few things i forgot to mention in last nites blog.

Nothing really interesting happened today. i didnt do anything at all, i shouldve done homework or something like that. I went to sleep @ 3am, then i ended up waking up @ 9am. I couldnt go back to sleep after that so it was like agh! talked to jennif online for a little bit. Depoisted my pay check into my account and then got some lunch. i was planning on going to the daycare to have romy help me do some camp stuff. that idea fell thorough the ground. haha Ended up doing laundry instead, which i needed to do anyway.

I sit hurr bored typing away cuz i dont know where errone is at. This was the first friday where i didnt do anything all day. it kinda sucked cuz i wanted to go out too. ::sigh:: I talked to ryan, jeanne, jaymee and arch today on the phone. i was walking home after picking up the film @ the one hour photo store by my house. The pictures turned out, which i was happy! I guess the film never got exposed after all. All of the pics turned out great, except for the few in the beginning. ahh but some of the best pictures are at the end of the set. im glad the couple pics that i was really hoping they would turn out, came out nice. ahh yes they make me smile! it was coo cuz i was worried the pics mightve been exposed since i dropped the camera, so i asked the lady if were was any way to check. She told me no, but if they were shed only charge me $1.50 for it. That was nice of her!

So im walking home from the one hour photo place and this kid is signalling me. Meanwhile i continute to carry on my phone convo, but i only look back as hes "excuse me." I got paranoid at first cuz i thought he was gonan try to take my phone. I dont know why but i guess i juss have that fear, after the whole pager incident a long time ago. I stop and he asks me if i have $2 he could have. i asked him what it was for, after all it is my $$. He told me needed it for the bus, i was like aww so i gave him the $2. Then he was talking to himself saying he needed to change his pants before going home. i dont know what that meant though.

had this funny convo w/reirich, i was kinda cracking up well cuz check it:
JPFish187: oh kuyas not on the other half today
JPFish187: ahha
rangeles122: was he suppose to be?
JPFish187: haha yeah
JPFish187: cuz hes one of the hosts
JPFish187: hahaha
rangeles122: hahahah
rangeles122: stoops
rangeles122: i thought u were serious
JPFish187: hahah

i thought that was funny cuz well you know kuyas like mario lopez. hahah if you dont know why, then ask me. Ill fill you in on that one. Went to mass and fr. kevin talked bout divorce and how the church doesnt accept it. I bought the "word among us." The daily mediations to use for lent. i cant believe next wed. is already lent. geez i can remember last easter vigil mass, i bought the upRm sweatshirt from mike. Though i had no idea what it stood for at that time, i juss liked the style of it. I got a spiritual director now, i asked father brennan today. i had to ask over the phone though cuz i guess he was too busy to come down to the rectory. Wow its almost 12 and yet still no one is on. where is errone?

I went to the bp mall tonite, cuz i was taht bored! checked out taht new dsw shoe wherehouse. Its huge, and its all hardcore cuz they got security guarding the doors. haha im exctied to see the new wal mart and the theatre open up this spring. Sometimes its a drag to drive all the way over to fullerton or the block to watch a movie. Hopefully they'll have some good restaraunts in that area too. The kohls is opening next fri. across from the mall. i think the one in cerritos towne center is bout to open too. That should market some business to the citizens of bp.

Went to target and i got this file folder to sort my bills out. I had all my stuff juss kinda stuffed inside my filing cabinet drawer. So i took time out and organized them all out. Now its all nice and clean, errthang is in its own section. I also put my pay check stubs in there from my ol job and this job now. Errtime i hear the "buddy in" sound i check to see who signed on, hoping it would be someone i wanna talk to. Though its not, juss the other people who sit and take up space in my buddy list to make it look bigger. haha jk wow i wrote a lot tonite, lets see wha else i can talk bout. I read this really good email bout why do good people suffer. It was something that kinda opened my eyes.

I hope ryans sister takes that job cuz well it would suck if she didnt. I dont understand why you would continue to say at job where you have a lot more responsiblity but less pay. getting underpaid for something you should get paid more doing. On top of that work 7 days a week and focus you world around work. that would be a bust! When you can trade that all in and work luxury style at a better place. I guess if youre comfortable with where youre at, but then you only end up regretting it. So in a sense i could relate to her, cuz thas how i felt when i first found out i got the job.

*questions were taken otu cuz they were dumb...kuya wanted a long blog, so here it is!

2. If there are 3 wells (love, beauty, and creativity) and you can drink from one of them, which would you choose?: as of now, imma choose love cuz thas what a lot us seem to need right now.

3. Do you wish on stars?: naw...

4. What is the most disgusting food you have ever eaten?: oh man that cow tounge i had @ tita cora's birfday party. i didnt know it was cow tounge till later on when mizike told me.

6. What's your favorite place?: blogger.com haha

9. What tv show or movie title best describes your life? hmm interesting question...boy meets world...i dont know? hha

10. Do you like your handwriting? its alright...

12. What kind of person do you want to marry?: someone that will find an imperfect person, perfectly...

13. What is your favorite lunch meat?: turkey

14. What do you want to do this weekend?: chill w/uprm...chill w/errone else

15. Do you think that the people on the gap commercials are cool? yeah cuz theyre so talented yet creative

17. Are you a daredevil?: it all depends! haha i dont do dares easily

18. How big was the biggest mango you ever had?: i dontk now ive always hadsmall ones

22. Do you pray?: uh yeah

23. Have you ever met anyone famous?: umm at those celeberity bball games yes

25. How do you vent anger?: talk to people

28. Who is your idol?: the american idol...haha jk i have many though and it would take forever to list them.
Many of them are from SH, others uprm some elsewhere

29. Who is your second family?: uprm & Sh of course

30. Do you trust others easily?: yup...depending upon how well i know the person.

31. What was your favorite toy as a child:? i had a lot...like the ol skool he-man, ninja turtles etc. etc.

33. What is your favorite joke?: the ones that are kept inside

34. Do you like sappy love songs?: yup

36. Which was your best Halloween costume?: i was moses one year. my mom made my costume

37. Have you ever been on radio or television?: yeah!!! i was on tv during the whole samantha runion thing. i had people tell me, "oh i saw you on tv!"

38. Do you keep a diary?: I used to write what i did errday in my organizer, i got too lazy afetr blog came long

41. Have you ever been in a mosh pit?: well not exactly

43. Do you feel understood most of the time?: yeah sure

44. Do you drink milk?: not as much

54. Could you be a vegetarian?: no way...

55. What word do you use when you think something is good?: tight, d0pe etc etc

57. Would you ever bungee jump?: oh skurry

58. Do you untie your shoes every time you take them off?: only some shoes I do

59. What's your favorite movie?: light it up! light it up!

60. What was the most embarrassing thing that has happened to you?: hmm

61. Have you ever given money to a bum?: yeah

63. Do ever wear overalls?: nope

64. Do you think you are strong (emotionally)?: for the most part yes

65. Do you hate anyone?: naw

66. Do you eat hot dogs?: good thing i ate one last sat. @ boss ladys event, otherwise i wouldve starved to death @ the wedding reception!

67. Do you regret anything?: yeah

70. What are you going to do next?: post the entry

72. What is your favorite quote?: cant think of one off the top of my ulo

73. Name 2 people you want to thank for their friendship.: sh & uprm

75. What is the thing you are most proud of?: how much ive grown in my faith since last year

"i will continue to revolve around your sun 'cause you are the only one who understands, who reaches out with both hands..."im done, im out God bless!